[sammymc]

Hi, my son was born December 31st of last year. His mother and her parents wanted me to sign over custody of him to her parents so that they could insure him under the grandfather's military insurance. When I refused because I didn't want to lose my parental rights and offered to get him insured through me, his mother began refusing to allow me to see him except at her house and then she and her family would yell at me and harass me and take the baby upstairs where I wasn't allowed to go. By the end of January she was refusing to allow me to see him period. February 3rd 2011, I applied for Maryland state insurance for my son and told her. She immediately went to social services and applied herself so I agreed to let her application take precedence since she was so adamant. A month later she called me and told me she was denied because her parents made too much money, when I called my social worker she said that no she was not refused but that the case was dropped because she didn't bring in my son's birth certificate which she had 30 days to do. March 8th 2011 I reapplied for health insurance for my son and was granted it. They then tried to have his insurance canceled. All this time she won't let me see him unless I sign over custody and she tells me that he can't go to the doctor for his shots. I made an appointment with a doctor close to her who accepts his insurance for 4 month shots and check up and she did not go to his appointment. I think they want to make it seem like he needs to be on her parents insurance, or that I am not caring.

February 8th 2011 she filed for sole custody of our son but will not serve me the papers. Yesterday her mom said I could go see my son at her house but I don't feel like its safe there because of how angry her dad and uncles got when I wouldn't sign over my son. They refuse to let me see him at my house or meet me halfway in public. I can't afford a lawyer and so far none of the pro bono lawyers are available to me. How do I file an emergency motion to get visitation during the week so I can take him to the doctor myself also I'd like shared custody. Even though she is acting like this I don't think she wants to hurt him I think its mostly her parents who want to use my son for financial gain or something. She is 18 and lives at home I am 20 and live at home, we are both in school. I was there for every prenatal visit and the birth and signed the affidavit of parentage even though we broke up as a couple the last 2 months of her pregnancy and she began seeing someone else. I love my son and want to see him and make sure he's seeing a doctor. He may not have seen one since I last saw him at around 2 months old.

[JudyKayTee]

In order to get specific advice which State are you in (assuming you are in the US)?

Generally - much of this is legally immaterial. The important part is if she files for custody (or anything else of a legal nature) you have to be served. That's how it works. She cannot proceed to Court unless/until you are served.

How she portrays you to a Doctor, her family, complete strangers, is immaterial. What matters is how the Court sees both of you and what the Court decides is in the best interest of the child.

You signed the Affidavit of Parentage. Whether she was dating someone else at the end of her pregnancy is also immaterial. Are you 100% positive that you are the father?

You can go to Court (Family Court is user friendly) and request Court-ordered visitation. I agree with you if her family is hostile - stay away, get a Court Order.

Don't wait for her to make the first move. Go to Court, protect your rights, get Court-ordered visitation (and a support order - I trust you are supporting the child?) and play a part in the child's life.

So far it sounds like you feel like you're a victim and to a certain extent you have been the victim. Take matters into your hands, get control of the situation, go to Court.

It will only get worse if you do nothing and allow her and her family to direct what you do and do not do.

[AK lawyer]

February 8th 2011 she filed for sole custody of our son but will not serve me the papers. ...

Yet, somehow, you know that she has filed. Go to the court clerk's office and ask to see the file. Then, assuming nothing has been entered in the file of which you are unaware, ask whether the court offers forms which you can fill-in and file. If not, you will have to draft your own motion. In either case, file it, serve it on your son's mother, etc. You should ask for a hearing because some courts will do nothing in the absence of a hearing.