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    chellis1991's Avatar
    chellis1991 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
    		  
    #1

    May 6, 2011, 10:41 PM
    Why won't my boyfriend have sex with me ?
    I am 19 and my boyfriend is 20 . We have known each other for 3 and a half years but only started dating and sleeping together for 6 months , we have lived together since we started dating and are both currently unnemployed so we spend a lot of time together. I love to have sex and I'm not ashamed of it but my boyfriend doesn't ever want to . And he continually come up with excuses like " oh wen our roomates arent here i will" and then when no one is here he just wants to do anything but have sex an says he is "tired"... don't most men dream of having a girlfriend that's horny 24/7? Why won't he have sex with me ? Am I doing something wrong ?
    CravenMorhead's Avatar
    CravenMorhead Posts: 4,532, Reputation: 1065
    Adult Sexuality Expert
    		  
    #2

    May 7, 2011, 06:44 AM

    He could just have a low libido. Does he have any health issues? Drink, smoke, pot a lot? Being unemployed is stressful and that could affect his libido.

    Had he gone to see a doctor?
    Cat1864's Avatar
    Cat1864 Posts: 8,007, Reputation: 3687
    Marriage Expert
    		  
    #3

    May 7, 2011, 09:19 AM

    Are you in school or looking for work? Both take an emotional toll as well as a physical and mental one.

    Is he concerned about an unplanned pregnancy? Even the best methods of birth control can fail (even when used correctly with more than one form. For example: condoms and the pill.)

    You have also not been involved for very long and have been living together since the relationship started. For some couples starting the lack of personal space can affect the relationship. Instead of building up to moving in together, you essentially jumped right in. (Knowing someone is not the same as dating. People act differently with friends than they do with partners.)

    Putting pressure on him to have sex can have the opposite effect and cause him to back off from it.

    In reality, how often are you having sex? Remember that he isn't a machine. His body may need time to reset after the last time.

    Why do you want sex? What is your perception of sex? What is his? It could be that you have differing expectations of 'making love'.

    Do you spend time just cuddling or getting to know each other?
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
    Uber Member
    		  
    #4

    May 7, 2011, 12:44 PM

    You are in a sexual relationship, living together, and you can't talk about this? That would concern me.
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