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    staceyjr67's Avatar
    staceyjr67 Posts: 25, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Apr 26, 2011, 07:57 AM
    When can a child decide if he wants to see the other parent
    My son is 11 1/2 and refuses to see his father. He just got awarded every other weekend starting in June. He has not ssen him in over a year. My son has seen 5 therapists and we had 2 guardian ad lidems. He is afraid to say that yes his dad did beat him. His dad also told him up to the age of 8 that he was not his father. What kind of sick puke does that to his own kid? I can recall at least half a dozen times when he beat him with a belt and I had to wrestle him off him. MY ex is a bodybuilder, sociopath, and has 64 guns. He told me never to speak of what he does to his kids. The guardian report states that supervised visits are recommended. Instead the judge ordered UNSUPERVISED visits. When is adolescence?
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #2

    Apr 26, 2011, 08:00 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by staceyjr67 View Post
    has 64 guns.
    I have over 150 guns. What does that have to do with anything as long as proper respect for firearms is taught?
    staceyjr67's Avatar
    staceyjr67 Posts: 25, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Apr 26, 2011, 08:03 AM
    Put it this way. They are in every corner of the house. He keeps them all loaded. He told me he would shoot me and put me in our outdoor wood boiler if I ever told anyone.
    excon's Avatar
    excon Posts: 21,482, Reputation: 2992
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    #4

    Apr 26, 2011, 08:08 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by staceyjr67 View Post
    When can a child decide if he wants to see the other parent
    Hello again, stacey:

    A child can't ever make that determination. In some cases, the judge MIGHT listen to the preferences of a child when he's, maybe 16 or 17. But, that's just LISTEN. The judge will (or is supposed to) decide what's in the child's best interest - NOT what the child wants.

    If that's not so in your case, and I don't believe it is, you need to appeal the judges decision. That's going to take a lawyer. If I recall, you don't have one.

    excon
    staceyjr67's Avatar
    staceyjr67 Posts: 25, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Apr 26, 2011, 08:14 AM
    As of yesterday, I hired an attorney. His wife went through the same deal when she was little like my daughter did. He is going to represent me on this case and for all the wrong doing my ex did to me. Hopefully things will work out fine. And also, I am putting my cabin up for collateral for the criminal part. Was just wondering if anyone had any answers for now, because it is so hard just sitting here waiting and wracking my brain about what my ex might do to our son.
    excon's Avatar
    excon Posts: 21,482, Reputation: 2992
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    #6

    Apr 26, 2011, 08:22 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by staceyjr67 View Post
    And also, I am putting my cabin up for collateral for the criminal part..
    Hello again, s:

    I know you've got some issues, but you seem to COMPOUND them by NOT understanding what is going on around you... Sometimes you just pop up with these really wacky things...

    CIVIL law costs money. It's NOT free. If you have a CIVIL case, YOU have to hire a lawyer...

    The CRIMINAL courts, on the other hand, while not free, the TAXPAYER pays for it - not the victim, or the victim's family. The services of the cops, the prosecutor, and the jailer shouldn't cost YOU a dime...

    So, WHY would you be putting your real estate up to PAY for something that is FREE to you??

    excon
    staceyjr67's Avatar
    staceyjr67 Posts: 25, Reputation: 1
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    #7

    Apr 26, 2011, 08:36 AM
    In order for my daughter to press charges against him, I need lots of money or collateral. I am willing to do whatever I have to do to get him off the streets so he doesn't do this to someone else. I tried the cops, had restraining orders, and nothing ever happened. Like I said, everyone in town knew him, and he's not a bad man, he could never molest a 13 year old girl. Hello? He fooled everyone, except for the experts. He had a lie detector test done, and only passed 3 questions. Name, age, DOB. Otherwise the investigator said his answers were off the charts. His psychological exam showed him that he was not credible for answering anything. I know it is probably hard for you to understand what kind of person he is. He is like Charlie Sheen, where he has to WIN WIN at everything. He is a 5 year old in a 47 year old body. He told me he would ruin me and make sure I had nothing if I ever divorced him. And he is doing a great job at that. And now if I screw up I could have my son taken away from me?
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #8

    Apr 26, 2011, 08:45 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by staceyjr67 View Post
    In order for my daughter to press charges against him, I need lots of money or collateral.


    Either you are lying to us OR someone is lying to you. There is no charge of any sort to press charges against a person. You are confusing criminal and civil law.
    staceyjr67's Avatar
    staceyjr67 Posts: 25, Reputation: 1
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    #9

    Apr 26, 2011, 09:03 AM
    I am not lying to anyone. My daughter had the CA handle her case and they dismissed it saying she was not strong enough to testify my ex. That is the only explanation we got from them. I have evidence that they never took from me or wanted to listen to. Found out she has up to the age of 19 to press charges against him for what he did to her.
    My case is a complicated one and has been since day 1.
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #10

    Apr 26, 2011, 09:05 AM

    So you are paying someone who in turn is going to force the Police or DA to press charges against your "ex?" That person is going to compel the Court to hear your daughter's testimony even though the system has already determined that she is not strong enough to stand up to cross examination?
    excon's Avatar
    excon Posts: 21,482, Reputation: 2992
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    #11

    Apr 26, 2011, 09:25 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by staceyjr67 View Post
    Found out she has up to the age of 19 to press charges against him for what he did to her.
    Hello again, stacey:

    We're going over old stuff here. It's true, the victim may file a complaint (press charges) against someone... But, once the victim does that, the system takes over. In your daughters case, the system decided that it couldn't get a conviction, so the case got dropped.

    You will NEVER get the prosecutor to do, what he already decided NOT to do. It won't happen no matter HOW MUCH collateral or money you have... It won't happen in a million years... If you have somebody telling you it can, they're LYING.

    You MAY have a shot at the US Attorney pressing civil rights violations against him. But, that won't cost you a dime either...

    excon

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