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    aimes123's Avatar
    aimes123 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Apr 2, 2011, 09:59 PM
    HELP! My friend keeps cutting himself!
    I don't see my friend very often since we left college but he's always been on antidepressants and lately he's overdosed yet he said he didn't have enough and it just made him ill, he also cuts himself and says it makes him feel happy and it feels good, he's been to the doctors who have give him stitches and told him to see a counciller but he won't! I don't know what to do but I don't want him to harm himself anymore!
    kaylaluv's Avatar
    kaylaluv Posts: 31, Reputation: 4
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    #2

    Apr 5, 2011, 08:25 PM
    You need to have a sit down chat and see what it is that's making him depressed, how you can help
    Put a stop to it, what else he can do to distract himself other than cutting, etc. And ask him if one day, when he finds the love of his life and has kids, if he wants them asking him how he got the scars. He would have to either lie to them or tell them the truth, but then what would they think of him? What if they tried it and got really hurt? Bring up things like that to him and help him realize stopping is the best thing to do and that there are other ways to vent.
    ramona_'s Avatar
    ramona_ Posts: 222, Reputation: 47
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    #3

    Apr 6, 2011, 11:44 AM
    I know it's very scary for you that your friend does this but you can not make him stop, he has to want to stop before anything else.

    Cutting is an addiction, it releases dopamine into the body and maybe the cutting is the only way he knows how to cope or helps him cope. Whatever you do, do not offend him or try to look at his cuts, if he wants to show you then he will in his own time - don't pressure him. It takes a lot of time to build a self-injurer's trust.

    The best you can do is talk to him and offer your support, that is what good friends are for, I know you might think that it would be useless just talking to him but talking to him could distract him from cutting. Tell him that whenever he feels like cutting he can always talk and you will always listen and never judge. You have to lay out a safety net for him, he needs somebody to fall back on because he is obviously stressed or very depressed.

    Instead of telling him to just "stop", I'd suggest that you mention how worried you are about it and scared that he may go too deep one day or accidentally hit a vein/artery. He will tell you that he knows what he's doing and he does, he controls how deep his "tool" goes to cut himself, he knows where is considered "safe" to cut and not "safe" to cut and if he does happen to go too deep then he knows exactly where to go and what to do as he has already taken himself to the ER to sort his wounds out.

    You say he is on anti-depressants, but they can't be working as he is feeling depressed, maybe you should suggest different medications.

    Good luck to you, your friend, his health and your friendship.

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