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hirley · Mar 30, 2011, 12:15 PM

My Ex is constantly violating our visitation agreement such as spending less time than what we agreed with our 9year old, and when our son visits with him, my ex will leave him with relatives, I didn't mind at first but recently our son has complained that he only gets to see dad for one day out of the 3 day visit, my son's therapist and I brought our safety concerns and he continued his way, recently his relative ( a 40 year old) got into a physical altercation with my 9 year old that resulted in son getting a bruised back, I filed a police report and I am afraid he will leave my son with relative again, my son does not want to go back for the same reason, what do I do?? I already tried talking to him and it didn't change anything...

ScottGem · Mar 30, 2011, 03:16 PM

This is NOT violating the visitation agreement. A parent cannot be forced to be a parent. Violating the visitation agreement would be to refuse to allow visitation.

That being said, you cannot refuse to allow him to exercise his visitation as long as the court order remains in place. If you do, he can have you cited for contempt of court.

So what you NEED to do is go back to court immediately, before his next visitation and apply for a modification of the support order. At the least require supervised visitation so your son is protected.

On a different note. You gave a reply of mine from almost TWO years ago a negative rating because you felt a child should not spy on a parent. First, that was a misuse of the rating feature. Negative ratings should only be given if an answer was factually incorrect or inaccurate. My answer was neither. Second, I was not advocating the child spy, but rather report something that may have been dangerous. If you are forced to allow your son's father visitation, don't you want your son to call you if he feels threatened? Your rating was somewhat hypocritical given your circumstances.

Fr_Chuck · Mar 30, 2011, 06:53 PM

Agreed, this is no way a violation of a visitation agreement. He does not have to visit, if he keep them past his time, but he does not have to visit at all.

You will have to go back to court

hirley · Mar 31, 2011, 03:13 PM

I'm sorry to hear you feel that way about the negative review I gave your answer.

ScottGem · Mar 31, 2011, 03:31 PM

Its not a matter of how I feel it's a matter of your violating the rules of this site.

hirley · Mar 31, 2011, 05:12 PM

Not according to terms of service

ScottGem · Mar 31, 2011, 05:32 PM

May I call your attention to the guidelines for using the comments feature found here:

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/feedba...ure-24951.html

Again you are wrong. This is how the Ratings feature should be used. Please point out anything that says differently. And you are going to tell ME the rules of this site after just joining when I've been here for more than 7 years. And, in fact, WROTE the rules for using this feature!

Fr_Chuck · Mar 31, 2011, 06:39 PM

First please use the answer button to place answers within the question,

But to be blunt, Scott who you are trying to tell the rules to, is one of the 4 Supermods over the entire site, he is the one who enforces the rules and most likely helped write some of them.

So don't start trying to quote rules to one of the head moderatator