[fraiser]

I loved my girl so much for almost 6 yrs now.. But with her it was almost on and off... After first few months she asked me not to talk as she doesn't want to get involved.. we didn't talk for 4 yrs.. then we had to meet again, we talked, became very close. I loved her from the time she asked me not to talk, in spite of knowing she will never love me back... she is pretty close with me now, I am fine with that as long as I remain a part in her life. Then I had to move(work) away from her. Miss her so much and she does too.. I figure she cannot love me only because of her family (very orthodox), but that's fine.. the way she loves her family makes me like her even more..
Now recently she is moving on with her life (long distance relationships especially in my case is so freakn difficult), I guess I am not her closest friend anymore. That's fine as long as I am at least in touch with her. I really really want her to be happy.. The thing is she will be getting married pretty soon. I really don't want to move on. Reciprocated or not my love is true and I want to keep it alive as long as I am. Also its so hurting and depressing even to imagine her with someone else, but if she is happy, I guess can live with that. I am confused with my life now, have no idea what to do with my career.. Any advice suggestions will be helpful.. thanks

[amicon]

She's getting married and you need to move on.

You can't go through your life mourning the past-you must pick yourself up and find a life that suits you-without her in it.

Somewhere,one day there will someone who is right for you.

[fraiser]

But I really do want her in my life.. at least as a friend who talks to her once in a while.. I have to make sure she is happy someway... is there any way

[fraiser]

Thanks for your reply... but I really do want her in my life.. at least as a friend who talks to her once in a while.. I have to make sure she is happy someway... is there any way..

[fraiser]

And also I am sure I will be all right as long as she is very happy with her life. I will be fine.. as for what I think me moving on is making my love for her so not true... I did love her.. if tats not true... then I can't really love anyone more.. sometimes I do want to concentrate on my life more and move on but with these ideas I really cant... I don't want to move on...

[talaniman]

This is not true love my friend, but a sick obsession that has gotten far out of hand. When you put someone before your own life and happiness, that's like a junkie who needs a fix, and has accepted his fate.

Your love has become an excuse not to love yourself, or try to have a life. And you never will until you get a healthy attitude about yourself. What you have is not true love, but a warped version of feelings that you refuse to let go of, and a healthy person would let go.

Get some help if you can't see that your life, and happiness is what's important, not hers. That's her responsibility. Sorry guy, your love is warped, and sorely misplaced.