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Penguin5023 · Mar 19, 2011, 07:31 PM

So I have a really close group of friends. I'm only in high school, and I'm really iffy about relationships. Over the summer, I fell really hard for this guy who we had just started hanging out with. I found out eventually that he liked me too, and we started dating. We dated for about two months.. I ended it only because it wasn't working out. But there were feelings on both parts when the relationship was over. Afterwards we managed to stay good friends- we were actually each other's best friend of the other gender, but my feelings for him were gone. This past week, he and my best friend tell me that they like each other. Last night they hooked up and are now officially in a relationship. Ever since I found out, I've been in the worst mood. It bothers me that they're dating- it hurts, actually. Is that wrong? I can barely talk to her, and he's mad at me for being upset. I have no idea what to do! I know I'm losing him already, but I'm so lost. It's awkward and uncomfortable to see someone so close to me with my ex...

grammadidi · Mar 19, 2011, 10:22 PM

Personally I feel that a good friend should never date an ex of a friend. No wonder you are feeling hurt. It's like a betrayal. Unfortunately, there is little you can do about it other than telling them both how you feel. I guess you can chose not to be a friend to either one of them, but that won't make your hurt go away.

There is no real right and wrong to emotions. You feel it... period. There are many ways of handling those emotions though. If you tell them how you feel then hold your head high, treat them both with respect and carry yourself with dignity you will feel better in the long run. Try to find something else to focus your attention on until the pain or the relationship subsides. You will probably find that the pain eases in time - especially if you find yourself caring for someone else as time goes on. Keep your chin up and remember that it will get easier as time goes on and you find other things to focus upon. Remember, for every door that closes another one opens. All this stuff is just preparation for better friendships and a lasting, deep love one day.

Hugs, Didi

Alexis1998 · Mar 21, 2011, 08:51 PM

Well it seems that your friend is not a good friend!!

talaniman · Mar 23, 2011, 06:32 PM

Don't take this so personally. Its not about you, or your feelings, but them, and their feelings. They fell for each other as you did before. Sure you feel a bit betrayed because its your friend, but would you feel the same way if it was another girl you didn't know so well. Probably not, but this was closer to home so more intense. Your feelings are normal, and they will fade with time if you leave them alone, and have your own fun, and do your own thing. At your age, chances are they to will break up and date others, but for now, you have to cope with your own feelings in a positive way.

Its not easy dealing with your own feelings, but see it as a life lesson learned.