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qv123 · Mar 13, 2011, 09:03 PM

Hi, this is pretty indepth but I need some help. I've been dating this guy for almost 3 years, he is 21 and I am 22, I am a very sexual person, our first year together was nothing but amazing. Our second year together, everything changed. In his personal life, we are both students, over the summer he could not find work, no car, I on the other hand did. In this perspective he felt less of a man, as he could no longer pay for things or drive anywhere, I was the one who was always paying and doing the driving. About a month after he no longer has work, his sex drive just shuts off, for over a year now, our sex life became once a month. And this only happened because I was constantly bringing it up. There were many discussions, arguments and even a short breakup. I tried to be suductive and pull every trick in the book, until it came to a point where I lost all the confidence in the world. I no longer feel sexy around him. And he doesn't put any effort into making me feel sexy. To this day our sex life is minimal to non exsistant. I'm crazy about him, and he claims he wants no one else but me for the rest of his life. But after fighting to have a hot sex life in our relationship, I no longer have that attraction to him anymore. What do I do? Pull the plug because he can't seem to regain himself? Ive done everything I can to be supportive, and gave plentyyy of opportunities to make him feel like a "man" but he neglected to take any of those. What do I do?

J_9 · Mar 14, 2011, 07:42 AM

This thread has been moved from Women's Health to Relationships so that it can get the responses it deserves.

talaniman · Mar 14, 2011, 08:33 AM

I don't know what you mean by Ive done everything I can to be supportive, and gave plentyyy of opportunities to make him feel like a "man" but he neglected to take any of those , But taking his inability to want sex personally, ain't the way to go.

I don't think sex is your problem, resentment over you working and him not is .Lack of sex is only a symptom of a problem in another area of this relationship, and has nothing to do with negligees, and acting like a man. There is something here that you are leaving out, or not disclosing that's more the problem than the sex.

I know he is a poor student, but how else does he spend his day? How does he help support the both of you?Is he actively looking for work, or has he given up?

In other words, what's his contribution to the team effort, or is this all on you?