[alexzhu2000]

About 4 years ago, my wife had some difficulties in her work, and she prayed to God and then she claimed she can hear from God. Since then she believes that she has super power, she can heal any illness. Last week my 8 years of daughter had a bad flu, cough continuously day and night for a week. I took a day off hoping to take my daughter to see a doctor, but my wife opposed me, caused a ugly fight. Luckly my daughter got better the next day.


What if my daughter get something serious, and this makes me really worried. Can any one have any advise. I trully believe my wife has mental illness, but she refuse to any help.

Thank you!

Alex

[joypulv]

I presume that you are all living together? You are capable of taking her to a doctor or hospital, or of calling an ambulance, and have a legal right to do so as a parent sharing full responsibility.
You can't declare that your wife has a mental illness unless you have clear proof that she cannot take care of herself and your daughter, or is a danger to herself or anyone else. Hearing God and believing that she can heal is not going to get her committed.

Therefore you have to work this out with her all on your own. Perhaps if you/she have a house of worship that you/she attend, you could talk to someone there about talking to her. Most clergy are good about convincing people not to go too far with faith healing without medical care.

Cold and flu viruses generally run their course in about a week at most, so your daughter was due to be better (could have been whooping cough though). If you are in the US, you cannot even be required to have a child vaccinated. Arguments about that are also between you and your wife.

IF your daughter becomes seriously ill, and IF your wife physically restrains her or you or threatens you, then you can proceed with steps to deal with all this some other way.

[alexzhu2000]

Thank you joypulv, currently my wife and I live together at the momment. I have done anything I can trying to help my wife without any results. I talked to a psychiatrist and she think my wife has serious psychic disorder but can't do anything without seeing my wife. No body seems has any influence on her any more including her parents and people from the church. I will force my way to get my daughter to a doctor if she get ill again. You mention in the end of your email, the other way, can you give a little bit detail, shoud I call the child abuse office?

[Fr_Chuck]

If you live together , just take the child to the doctor, there is nothing the wife can do to stop you. Remember you allowed the child to be sick that long without taking the child to the doctor also, so I would just start forcing the issue when it happens,

[alexzhu2000]

Thank you Fr_Chuck, you know, when I tried to take my daughter to the hospital, both my daughter and wife were against me, and my wife would do anything to stop me, I mean anything including hurting my daughter. That is why I am trying to find out what kind of help that I can get before I lost myself. Thank you again for your help.

[ScottGem]

There have been cases where parents have been sued for denying proper medical care to a child. But that means going to court.

If you think your wife is going to interfere with the proper care of your daughter, then you will need to go to court to get legal custody so you can make these decisions.

P.s. Please use the Answer options if you have a follow-up question or info, not the Comments.

[J_9]

my wife would do anything to stop me, I mean anything including hurting my daughter.

If your wife would hurt your daughter, call the police.

[joypulv]

You don't say where you live (even what country), but you can start with Social Services, Child and Family Services, etc. in the phone book. In small towns it might just be a social worker who covers several towns.

However, you aren't at the stage yet of anything to charge your wife with, and to do so is to disrupt your family and home, so you need to really think about the consequences. Family and clergy need to step in more to help (your job to keep telling them).

You also can't be afraid to act out of fear that your wife MIGHT do something. You need to act based on your convictions and deal with each reaction as it happens, and stick to your resolve.

If your daughter also needs routine medical and dental checkups, take her. If your wife reacts in a way that is dangerous to anyone, call the police, just as you would if she tried to stop an ambulance. They won't take her away (probably to a hospital)unless something really extreme happens. THEN report that to Social Services.

[alexzhu2000]

Thank you so much to all of you, for providing support and very good information.

I live in northern California. I am sure next time, when my daughter get sick again and my wife will stop me from taking my daughter to hospital, and I will have to call the police.

I am trying to see if there are anything else I can do before the next explosion. Really the only thing I care is my daughter, I want to weigh the concequences of those actions. I will contact social service and see what they can do or get some information.

It seems no one can persuade my wife, she is a sick person and refuse to admit it.

[AK lawyer]

... It seems no one can persuade my wife, she is a sick person and refuse to admit it.

Then maybe you should be praying for her.