[nethinkuwant]

So I tell my best friend that I like him and he takes it the wrong way. Now he is not talking to me because he says that he cannot hang out with a friend he has knows so long that likes him. We were best friends and now were nothing. (in his eyes). I still love him as a best firned and its like he thinks I will jump across the couch (on top of him) if we see each other. The reason why I told him I liked him is because I thought he liked me too, I thought he was too shy to tell me so I broke the ice. We always talk about sex and stuff together and how he wants to lose his virginity so I took it as his way of saying that he liked me. I don't understand how you can be friends for 5 years and nothing within a day. We were so close that my mom and his mom even let us sleep over eachothers houses... I find it hard to understand... we have so many memories together... I think he likes me...

Does this mean that he never really enjoyed hanging out with me? (because if we were friends for that long then I would think he would want to talk about the situation. When I told him he just out and said we can't hang out anymore... and since then we haven't talked)

Does he like me and is afraid of what others will think, so he is running away from him problems?

What should I do to get my best friend back? (I still love him very much and he is very close to my heart, I don't necessarly wanta relationship, but if we had one I would be very happy, and I told him I couldforget about the whole think, but he won't drop it)

I write in a journal about my thoughts eveyrday. (about what I would tell him if we were talking and how I feel about thesituation, one day when we arefriends again, I want him to read it)...

Help... what do I do?

[chuff]

I think he's doing what he thinks is best. He's trying to difuse the tension between you. I'm sure he's enjoyed all the time you've spent together. But he also knows that if he starts dating someone that could effect his relationship with you then. I've been friends with ex girlfriends but it's taken time to get there. The same can be applied to your situation. It's going to take time for your feelings to die down and maybe then you can resume your friendship. So now you have to do other things to take the focus off him and bring it back to yourself.

[talaniman]

help... what do I do?

Simple, you back off and let him handle his own thoughts and feelings. He may come round or he may not but either way give him room and don't pressure him at all. Focus on other area's of your life.

[shygrneyzs]

You ask, "does this mean that he never really enjoyed hanging out with me?"

No it does not mean that at all. If he did not enjoy that time you spent together, he would not have been there. It appears obvious that neither of you two were using each other. He genuininely liked you, he most liikely still does, but does not know how to handle it now. For you to "break the ice", it took courage to be that honest.

Now take this time to see what he decides to do - BUT please carry on with your own life. He knows where you live. It could be alos that he feels a bit embarassed - he shared his deepest thoughts with you, thinking that it would never come around to you telling him your feelings about him. I am sure it took him offguard and the surprise was more than he could process.

So be patient with him and more importantly, with yourself. Make sure you stay in the flow of your friends and activities. Do not keep yourself away from other people that you enjoy. It may turn out that you and he can remain friends, wouldn't that be great? It may turn out that he does not feel that way. Yes, that would be sad, but this is all part of the growing up into adulthood. No one ever promises decisions come easily or painless.

I do wish you the very best. Having been there and done that, I know how you are feeling. I hope you are not second guessing yourself - like "if only I had not said this or that" That is just beating yourself up for no good reason. Take care.

[talaniman]

By shygrneyzs

So be patient with him and more importantly, with yourself. Make sure you stay in the flow of your friends and activities. Do not keep yourself away from other people that you enjoy. It may turn out that you and he can remain friends, wouldn't that be great? It may turn out that he does not feel that way. Yes, that would be sad, but this is all part of the growing up into adulthood. No one ever promises decisions come easily or painless.

Had to spread the rep but this is so well said and true.