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kjeanne · Jan 14, 2011, 08:04 PM

My ex and I were never married but he is on the birth certificate for both children. He pays child support for our older child but we have never gone through the court system for visitation or custody. It has finally come to the point where he needs to take me to court though. He doesn't show up most of the time when he says he is going to take the kids, sometimes without even a phone call. When he does take them he hardly answers his phone when I call. He refuses to tell me where he takes them, who is around them or what they do at all really. He tells me over and over that it is simply not my business. I will not fight him on visitations, I want him to see the kids... but what rights would I still have and how lenient would it be... Will the courts agree that I should have no say and even no knowledge regarding my kids when he has them? Would the fact that he is a convicted felon (no violent felonies) make any sort of difference? FYI we live in Massachusetts.

Fr_Chuck · Jan 14, 2011, 08:23 PM

1. he does not have to tell you where he is taking them
2. he does not have to tell you who they are around,
3. does not have to tell you what they do.

Depends on how often you call if he really had to answer the phone also.

He could be given up to 50/50, every other week even.

At the least he is most likely to get every other weekend and one evening during the week.

He will merely pick them up and bring them back, he will not be required to tell you what he is doing or where he is going.

And no he being a convicted felon, unless he would be a risk to the children does not make a difference.

Does he know every where you go and everyone you see when you have HIS kids? Works both ways, But no you will just have to let him take the kids, wave by and see them when he brings them back,

kjeanne · Jan 14, 2011, 08:31 PM

I only call twice a day. He does know what we do & anyone the kids are around. He always asks questions, I tell him anything he wants to know, I know they are his kids as well. I just feel like my 8wk old is still so young to be away..

Fr_Chuck · Jan 14, 2011, 09:16 PM

You may ask, or ask him to take a parenting class, it will be up to the judge. But often judges look at it the same as a married couple, if you were together, he could or would have the right to take the child and be responsible to care for the child, same as you.

Some courts may still require the child to be 6 months to do over nights, but he would be allowed to take the child out for a few hours at a time for visits.