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blossomxo · Dec 26, 2010, 11:36 AM

Please help to give me peace of mine. I had unprotected sex with a man around the 30th October... he did not ejaculate. My problem is that on the 23rd of November I then slept with my best friend of 8 years. I done a pregnancy test a week after this and it was negative. I then had a slight bit of bleeding ( I've looked up on the internet that this may be implantation). I then took another pregnancy test and it was positive. How likey do you think the baby is my bestfriends?? Any advice would be wonderful thank you

joypulv · Dec 26, 2010, 03:03 PM

Impossible to predict, and you don't even state the dates when you got the spot bleeding, or the positive.
But if I had to guess, I would say the friend.

Fr_Chuck · Dec 26, 2010, 03:46 PM

If the pregnancy test was done only a week or so after having sex the second time ( my guess from trying to read what you wrote) It is unlikely to be from the second time you had sex since most likely it would not register on a pregnancy test yet

But you are going to have to really wait for the child to be born and get a DNA test to be sure

blossomxo · Dec 27, 2010, 03:05 AM

Thanks for your reply the first pregnancy test was done a week after I slept with my best friend and it was negative so I was hoping if I had of been pregnant to the first guy it would have shown positive by that stage

blossomxo · Dec 27, 2010, 03:07 AM

Thank you for the reply I got the bleeding about a week and a half after sleeping with my friend. I only got the positive about a week ago now the first tesst was done 3-4 weeks after sleeping with the first guy and it was negative

blossomxo · Dec 27, 2010, 03:07 PM

I slept with a fella on the 30th of October... he did not ejaculate, then on the 23rd of November I slept with my best friend of 8 years (was with him 5). I done my first pregnancy test a week after sleeping with my best friend and it was negative ( would this have shown up positive if it was the first guy?) then a week after this I had slight bleeding and assumed it was a period. I then done another test and I was positive. I got an early scan today and the midwife told me I am 5 weeks 4 days, though I should only be 5 weeks tomorrow if its my best friends baby. Can they be out a week? If it was the other guys would it not show up over 8 weeks now and should the first pregnancy test after near four weeks not been positive if it was him. Please any advice would be great. Thank you

blossomxo · Jan 13, 2011, 04:02 AM

I slept with a guy on the 31st of October though he did not ejaculate. I then slept with my best friend on the 23rd of November he did ejaculate. After about a week of sleeping with the 2nd guy I done 2 pregnancy test strips that were negative. Then over a week or so later I felt very ill so done another one and it was positive this time. My problem being that I really don't want it to be to the first guy. He is mean and horrible. The second guy is my best friend.

I got two early scans, the first one she told me the baby was 5 weeks when if it was the second guys it would only be 4 weeks old. However she explained to me that they add on two weeks to the sexual intercourse date if you don't know your last period which I didn't. I got a second scan again the ultra sound dated me pregnant longer than the baby's age from sex but the dates did show I conceived with the second guy my best friend. Do all midwives date the pregnancy 40 weeks. Im due betweent the 14tha and 22nd of August. These due dates do state that the baby was conceived around the 23rd of November. Meaning Im hopefully certain the baby is my best friends.

My questions are

Are the early scans very accurate?
Would the first pregnancy test not have been positive if it had been the first guys as they were done about 3-4 weeks after sex with him?
Can I be sure the baby is my best friends as the first guy didn't ejaculate also I had some bleeding about 14 days after sex with my best friend.

I appreciate any reply thank you very much

DoulaLC · Jan 13, 2011, 04:26 AM

Did you have a normal period after the 31st of October but before the 23rd of November? If you did, this would make it even more likely to be the best friend's. That the other guy didn't ejaculate, also raises the odds it is the best friend's.

Some women don't get a positive on a pregnancy test before they even miss a period, others not for several weeks, so you can't really use that to date a pregnancy very well. When was the second scan? With a later scan they measure different parts of baby's body to determine approximately how far along in development baby is. This can give them an approximation but it is usually more accurate than going by last menstrual period dating. They may do another scan about 18-20 weeks and that may alter your due date again slightly. However, even with ultrasound dates are not exact. This, and that women will not all carry the same number of days, is why you have a window of time at the end of pregnancy for giving birth.

Obviously the best way to know for sure would be to have DNA testing done after baby is born.

blossomxo · Jan 13, 2011, 05:25 AM

Both early ultrasounds were making me around a week longer than I really should be. Though the conception dates whether counting 38 weeks pregnant or 40 are working out the week I slept with my best friend. The midwife give a due that between the 14

blossomxo · Jan 13, 2011, 05:27 AM

And 22 of August on both scans this again works out to be my best friends. I have another scan tomorrow morning. I should be about 7.5 weeks. If the ultrasounds the same it will date me at 8.5 weeks, this is still over 2.5 weeks of a difference from

blossomxo · Jan 13, 2011, 05:27 AM

When I slept with that horrible man first. Sorry I couldn't squeeze all of this into one comment box for some reason. THank you very much for your help with this xx

blossomxo · Jan 13, 2011, 05:28 AM

Oh sorry I forgot to mention I have had CIN 1 for the past two years (very abnormal smears) therefore my periods are not regular and sometimes not at all.

Fr_Chuck · Jan 13, 2011, 05:45 AM

First you are not suppose to be using the comment feature to answer a question, so you are using the feature wrong.

Please go to the "answer" or "post quick answer" area and actually answer your own question to give more and complete follow up info.

But please stop using the comment feature, this is not what that is for.

But to be blunt, the scans are good ESTIMATES and are not to the day or even week.

The best we can do is say that esp if you had a period between the two times of having sex, it is most likely the second. But there is no way for us, or any doctor doing a scan to be 100 percent sure

So you will not know and not be 100 percent sure, till the baby is born and a DNA test is none.

blossomxo · Jan 20, 2011, 01:43 PM

Ok, slept with a guy on the 31st of October and a different guy on the 23rd of November the midwives have told me I conceived round about the 21st of November! Who is more likey to be the father? Thank you so much for any reply. Xxx

J_9 · Jan 20, 2011, 02:04 PM

They told you that you conceived around the 21st, but since they weren't in your fallopian tube at the time the sperm met the egg, they are only giving you an educated guess.

You are going to have to have a paternity test once the baby is born to find out who the father is.

ISneezeFunny · Jan 27, 2011, 10:06 PM

Depends on your ovulation calendar.

And even so, the paternity's questionable.

Only way to be sure is taking a paternity test.

ISneezeFunny · Jan 27, 2011, 10:07 PM

Babies are made in the fallopian tube?!

J_9 · Jan 27, 2011, 10:17 PM

Comment on J_9's post

Babies are made in the fallopian tube?!

Think about it Doc... back to Anatomy and Physiology 101.

If they weren't made in the fallopian tube, why do we have tubal pregnancies?

Yes, the sperm meets the egg in the fallopian tube. In most cases the fertilized egg continues to travel down the tube to the uterus where it implants. In other cases, such as scarring in the tube, the fertilized egg gets "stuck" in the tube.

blossomxo · Mar 10, 2011, 08:31 AM

Please don't judge me for my stupid mistake. I slept with a fella between the 23rd and 31st of October which was a huge mistake. I then slept with my best friend on the 23rd of November. I am pregnant and due date at last scan was 22nd of August. There has been a couple of different due dates. One being the 17th August, 22nd August and an earlier one of 14th August, most recent scan was the 19th August. Please just advise me on paternity chances. I will also add that as disgusting as it sounds the fist guy did not ejaculate. THank you for any kind advice x

J_9 · Mar 10, 2011, 08:33 AM

Firstly, I need to know your EXACT due date.

In the end, you will have to take a paternity test after the delivery of your baby to legally identify the father of your baby.