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    confused1992's Avatar
    confused1992 Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Nov 11, 2010, 09:00 PM
    Is this relationship worth pursuing?
    So I have been in a "relationship" with this guy almost a month. We have known each other since we were younger, went to school together, so we have known each other a long time. We started hanging out getting closer and things went from friendly to both of us deciding to get to know each other better and see if there could be a possible relationship. He is VERY confusing though. We have gone on dates gone to parties together, normal stuff. But I'm starting to get impatient because he really isn't affectionate toward me and when I mentioned it to him he made some good points about the things he has done lately. He texts me a good bit throughout the day, picks me up from work and hangs out with me a good bit, sometimes he will just come by my job and see me. And it has only been a month... am I just being impatient and expecting too much? I just don't want to be lead on... he says he likes me a lot but "isn't ready for a relationship yet" as far as I know I am the only girl he is talking to... what do I need to do?
    flowerchildfala's Avatar
    flowerchildfala Posts: 96, Reputation: 16
    Junior Member
     
    #2

    Nov 11, 2010, 10:59 PM
    Darling when a guy says "im not ready for a relationship yet" you walk away and let him contact you when he is!! Guys will say that and not want any commitment and unless your OK with that then stop having hopes about this guy! Guys like him will only break your heart!! Also talk to him again and see why he isn't affectionate, I had an ex who even after 4 months of being a couple wouldn't hold my hand or hug me!! I couldn't take it and relised that he wasn't going to change and left! It's better to be single than date a cold unaffectionate person!
    mmresd's Avatar
    mmresd Posts: 2,002, Reputation: 553
    Ultra Member
     
    #3

    Nov 12, 2010, 12:28 PM
    Hmm... maybe he just got out of a bad relationship. Or maybe he just wants to be your friend. Either way, why does it matter, if you feel like he is beating around the bush then go find someone who doesn't, it doesn't seem like he is leading you on, he is just having a good time with a girl he knows, you are leading yourself on by thinking his actions might mean more than what they are clearly showing, friendship! Just that fact that you typed "relationship" obviously states that one does not actually exist, so get out of your head and take a look at the reality of where you are at with this dude.

    Good Luck,

    Javi
    simii's Avatar
    simii Posts: 33, Reputation: 9
    Junior Member
     
    #4

    Nov 26, 2010, 07:31 PM
    May be he just look you as a friend and clearly he told you that he is not ready for a relationship anyway one month time is too less to decide anything... let thing run on its course and just take him as a friend if he wants to come to you he will if dosen`t than better for you not to get more attached emotionally... go and find some else for yourself start meeting up people and dating that will take your mind off from him... rest give him time to realise what he wants but just don`t BE AN OPTION TO HIM.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #5

    Nov 27, 2010, 12:07 PM

    Slow down! You said you both decided to get to know each other better to see if a relationship was possible.

    We started hanging out getting closer and things went from friendly to both of us deciding to get to know each other better and see if there could be a possible relationship.
    No matter how long you have known each other before, a ,month is not long enough to know if your meant to be an official couple or not, and he has been upfront about what he thinks now.

    he says he likes me a lot but "isn't ready for a relationship yet" as far as I know I am the only girl he is talking to... what do I need to do?
    And it doesn't matter if you are the only girl he hangs with, or talks to, NOT ONE BIT. He has told you how he feels so what you should do is not be so available to him, not so eager to have more than what he can give, and not so quick to make him a top priority in your life.

    Enjoy getting to know each other, but have other things you enjoy besides him. Maybe this will not turn into a relationship at all, and you will be better off as friends, and buddies.

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