[davina66]

I've just found out my husband masturbates whenever I go out,at first he lied about it ,now he's admitted it but says he only thinks about me when he's doing it and promises he doesn't watch anything on the net.I don't believe him,we have a very fulkl sex life,at least 4times\ a week.I feel like there's something wrong with me

[tickle]

Men masturbate for whatever reason. It is what they do from time to time; they have probably done it since puberty. Women masturbate from puberty. Don't make a big deal about. Make it part of your sex play, have him masturbate in front of you. Why would you feel there is something wrong with you because of this. Your insecurities are showing.

[Fr_Chuck]

Why does it bother you if he does, men do, some more than others, if it is not effecting your normal sex life, if he wants to every day, does it hurt you in some way ?

And I guess he lied about it ( should not have) because he knew you would get upset for some unknown reason.

[answerme_tender]

Okay have to ask-How in the world did you know he was masturbating if you were gone in the first place. It not something he would just bring up at the dinner table.

[QLP]

Warning, this may sound harsh, but only because I want you to look at this from a different point of view:

If you have a good sex life why is it a problem? If he was choosing it instead of sex then you should be worried.

I'm female and I masturbate sometimes. I would actually be really quite cross if my husband questioned me about it as though it was something wrong. My body, to do with as I please, as long as it is alone or with him. Same for him.

I actually think you questioning him on this is an invasion of his privacy. It sounds insecure and controlling.

Sorry for the harshness but I think you need to examine your behaviour on this one not his. I think you need to work on your own self confidence if you find this a threat.

[talaniman]

Bet you would have felt better if he lied to you, wouldn't you? Maybe he will have to in the future and save you both a headache. Is that what you really want?

Its really a non issue if he takes care of his manly duties as a husband. I take it you don't self love yourself when he isn't around. You are entitled to that, and he should have lied to save you from yourself.

[Philw]

First of all Ive been masturbating since I was 15. Ive been married for 13 years. I have been through long periods of no sex. Not by my choice! The longest usually after the children were born. I have never cheated on my wife. I have been asked about watching porn and have denied it even though I did. I think I was embarrassed so I lied. But we watched porn together a few times before children. Now she knows I watch porn and that I masturbate. After a few days of no sex I start getting angry and I act like a jerk. When I masturbate I feel better like a lot of pressure is taken of me, and Im good for a few more days or longer. I think I would masturbate anyway but it helps. She knows I do it and I know she does it. We rarely bring it up. Usually jokingly. It hasn't been a problem. I wouldn't wory about it too much.