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    rockerblue05's Avatar
    rockerblue05 Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Oct 12, 2010, 08:44 PM
    Desperate for Help
    I have a dilemma. I live in a home with my younger sister, mother, father, and my sister's son. Her son is only 2 yrs old. Since the day he was born she has not supported him at all. She has not provided for him financially or physically. She has no income at all because she has no job and has not attempted to look for employment or assistance. She does not even know how to change a diaper or bathe him by herself. To top it all off she is a violent person with some serious mental problems. She takes off with her boyfriend whenever she has an argument with someone and she has been physically abusive to myself and my mother. She leaves for a couple days at a time with or without an argument occurring. She also has met several guys through the internet and trusts anyone around her son. We live in Georgia and I would like to know how to go about my parents getting custody of him or them filing abandonment against her. Someone please help me or he will wind up getting hurt.
    cdad's Avatar
    cdad Posts: 12,700, Reputation: 1438
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    #2

    Oct 13, 2010, 03:56 AM

    Where is the father of this child?

    Also if she is getting physical then call the police and have her arrested for domestic violence. Once she is taken away you or your parents can file something for temp custody. Guardianship.

    You or whomever must follow through with all steps.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #3

    Oct 13, 2010, 04:21 AM

    You have things reversed. First, IF abandonment applied here then you would file for that first. But it doesn't apply. In GA abandonment refers to not supporting your child.

    So what your parents need to do is first file for guardianship of the child. They can later apply for custody. I would advise them getting a Family Law attorney. Also the child's father will need to be involved.
    rockerblue05's Avatar
    rockerblue05 Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Oct 15, 2010, 03:57 AM
    Comment on ScottGem's post
    Well the dad gave up his rights. She has NEVER supported her child AT ALL. She doesn't even cook for him, change him, or bathe him. She has never bought anything he needs. It costs $2500 to get things going, which is money we don't have.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #5

    Oct 15, 2010, 04:02 AM

    First, please don't use the comments feature for follow-up. Use the Answer options instead.

    Second, a father can't give up his rights. Only a court can terminate parental rights. So he will still need to be involved.

    Family Law courts are not as formal, so I would start by applying for guardianship without an attorney. You can try local law schools, many have free clinics that can help you prepare the paperwork.
    rockerblue05's Avatar
    rockerblue05 Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Oct 15, 2010, 04:02 AM
    Comment on califdadof3's post
    The dad gave up his rights. My sister attacked my mom and she filed a report at the hospital. They were going to issue a warrant. If she goes quietly there will be no warrant and she gets help. It costs $2500 for a lawyer, which we don't have.
    rockerblue05's Avatar
    rockerblue05 Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #7

    Oct 15, 2010, 04:15 AM
    Well the thing is that my sister attacked my mom a few nights ago. My mom went to the hospital to file a report, but because it's domestic violence there would be a warrant whether she pressed charges or not. My mom spoke with a detective that is working on the case. She said that if my sister goes to anger management, therapy, etc. on her own, there will be no warrant. If she doesn't go on her own, they will arrest her and the therapy and anger management would be part of her probation. So she will get help either way. The thing with the dad is that they (him and my sister) agreed that the child wasn't his, whether he is or not I don't know. So after that, even if he gets a DNA test done now or years from now, he has no rights to the child. That's what the lawyers said. As far as abandonment, I don't know if I would consider my sister's actions abandonment or not. Because she has NEVER taken care of him AT ALL. She has not paid for anything, and she doesn't cook for him, bathe him, dress him, potty train him or anything. It costs $2500 for a family lawyer to get things going, which is money we don't have. And the juvenile court said we will need a lawyer if she doesn't give my parents custody voluntarily.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #8

    Oct 15, 2010, 04:23 AM

    1) Sorry, but the father's rights remain, he just has to enforce them. If the mother or legal parent filed for child support he would have to pay once a paternity test confirmed he's the father. I don't know what you were told, but I think it was misunderstood. Right now he has no rights because he didn't acknowledge paternity. But if paternity is established the rights will be there.

    2) Its not abandonment. Pure and simple. IF someone else got custody and child support was ordered and she didn't pay, that would be abandonment in GA. What exists now is not.

    3) The courts gave you wrong info or you misunderstood. NO court can require that you have an attorney. You have the right to represent yourself in a court of law. You may need help preparing the paperwork, but there should be free or low cost help available to you or rather your parents.
    rockerblue05's Avatar
    rockerblue05 Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #9

    Oct 15, 2010, 07:29 AM
    Ok about the dad's rights, I'm going by what three lawyers and a police detective have told me, so I don't think I've been misinformed and I don't think they're wrong. The dad said in the beginning that he did not care if he was even his, and they all told me that he can't go back on that, paternity test or not. And the mom doesn't want child support. I never said it was abandonment, I said I wasn't sure. It seems more like neglect than anything since she's never actually taken care of him. Like I said before, I know I don't HAVE to have an attorny, but I do have to have one if she doesn't voluntarily give my parents custody of him. That's what juvenile court said.
    cdad's Avatar
    cdad Posts: 12,700, Reputation: 1438
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    #10

    Oct 15, 2010, 01:17 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by rockerblue05 View Post
    Ok about the dad's rights, I'm going by what three lawyers and a police detective have told me, so I don't think I've been misinformed and I don't think they're wrong. The dad said in the beginning that he did not care if he was even his, and they all told me that he can't go back on that, paternity test or not. And the mom doesn't want child support. I never said it was abandonment, I said I wasn't sure. It seems more like neglect than anything since she's never actually taken care of him. Like I said before, I know I don't HAVE to have an attorny, but I do have to have one if she doesn't voluntarily give my parents custody of him. That's what juvenile court said.
    There must be some kind of misunderstanding going on here. The lawyers are correct that he has no rights even as Scott has said. But if the courts order a DNA test then he can't refuse. He has no right to just walk away from HIS responsibility like that. If that were the case thousands would be lining up to proclaim they have no interest therefore don't need to pay child support.

    All states have alaigned with the federal government in proclaiming that both parents share in the responsibility of the child. Is there something else we aren't aware of that went on ? Like domestic violence and he was forced to sign over rights because he harmed the child?
    AK lawyer's Avatar
    AK lawyer Posts: 12,592, Reputation: 977
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    #11

    Oct 15, 2010, 02:14 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by rockerblue05 View Post
    ... It costs $2500 for a family lawyer to get things going, which is money we don't have. ...
    You said that several times. How do you know? Did you ask every attorney in your area?
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #12

    Oct 15, 2010, 02:52 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by rockerblue05 View Post
    Ok about the dad's rights, I'm going by what three lawyers and a police detective have told me, so I don't think I've been misinformed and I don't think they're wrong. The dad said in the beginning that he did not care if he was even his, and they all told me that he can't go back on that, paternity test or not. And the mom doesn't want child support. I never said it was abandonment, I said I wasn't sure. It seems more like neglect than anything since she's never actually taken care of him. Like I said before, I know I don't HAVE to have an attorny, but I do have to have one if she doesn't voluntarily give my parents custody of him. That's what juvenile court said.
    I'm sorry, but what you are saying flies in the face of everything I know about Family Law. Almost all states follow a uniform code when dealing with paternity. While there are differences from state to state, some things are universal. Fact #1-A father has no rights until and unless he is recognized as the legal father. Fact #2-A father can be recognized as the legal father in one of several ways. Fact #3-A parent cannot voluntary relinquish their parental rights except to clear the way for an adoption. In any case, only a court can terminate those rights. Fact #4 A US citizen has the right to represent themselves in a court of law.

    So when you tell me that you were told the father can never go back on his decision to not acknowledge the child, I KNOW that either you were misinformed or misunderstood or something else happened that you haven't told us. And when you tell me that a court said you HAD to be represented by legal counsel, again I KNOW that you were misinformed or misunderstood since this is a constitutional right.

    I don't want to argue with you I want to help you. And I KNOW that the advice I have given you here is legally correct and accurate. What you want to do with that advice is up to you.

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