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    ConfusednGuilty's Avatar
    ConfusednGuilty Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Oct 3, 2010, 01:19 PM
    Complicated Love Story
    Ok... So here it is, from the beginning.

    When I was young, I feel in love with my current girlfriend. Our relationship was destined to take separate paths, because we both were going away to college in different states. At first, we tried to make it work. It lasted until the beginning of my second year. After that, we mutually agreed to go our separate ways. The burdens and distractions of college life were too heavy for us at the time. So during that time, I went out, met people, and did what every other college student did. My girlfriend did the same, dated around, basically did her own thing. We still remained close, but understanding.

    Around my third year, I began to casually date a girl. Even till this day (5 yrs later), I don't know how seriously we took our relationship. We were close because we were friends, and intimate at times. We did a lot for each other, and for all intents and purposes, it looked like a relationship even though neither of us put labels on each other, nor introduced each other to our hometown friends and families. During holiday breaks, my ex and I would still hang out. The new girl was obviously threatened by this, and I would just tell her that we were just friends, and that at times it was virtually impossible to avoid hanging out with her because we had the same group of hometown friends.

    So by the end of college, the new girl started to question the seriousness of our relationship and wonder whether it would continue after wards. We both were moving back home, and we lived in different states. We tried to make it work, by meeting up in our college town, and basically reliving the past. This lasted for about 6 months, then 3 months later, I told the girl that she was free to date whomever she wanted and move on with her life. We still kept in touch, nothing serious or romantic. Just things dealing with our day to day life. Eventually, she started dating around, but it was evident that she still had feelings for me. I, on the other hand, had realized that my ex-girlfriend and I still had a connection, and I begun to date her, lightly, at first, but soon became serious...

    Another year passes...

    My ex and I broke up because she realized that I still had things to work out within myself and those things were weighing down our relationship. I thought it was done, so I did was most people do when they are hurting. Do something stupid.

    I called up the girl from college, we met, had a fling. Horrible mistake.

    I felt disgusted with myself. A month later... my ex came back to me. We both realized how much we missed and loved each other. I immediately cut contact with the girl from college, yet she continued to call and txt me.

    7 months later, through the internet, she found out that I had been dating my ex, and she was devastated... She confronted me, and I admitted that I was dating my ex-girlfriend, and that we were no longer going to talk to each other anymore

    I felt guilty, so I spilled the beans to my girlfriend. We had an open honest conversation about what we did in college, and what I did 7 months before. We are moving past that, 100% committed. All that good stuff.

    My question is... How likely is that this girl will try to make my life a living hell for all the things I did to her? Meaning, contacting my current girlfriend? If and when is it reasonable to contact the girl from college to apologize for my stupidity?

    I was young, I still am. I was confused and all over the place, and I am coming to terms with that. I know what I did was wrong, that I was in self denial, that I was emotionally cheating, and that I was being unfair to the other girl for so long and didn't take her feelings into consideration. I obviously feel horrible for what I did to the girl in college, and I know that she will never forgive me. I just need some advice and clarity.
    LifeChangesMan's Avatar
    LifeChangesMan Posts: 329, Reputation: 39
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    #2

    Oct 4, 2010, 01:08 PM
    Hey pal,

    Just to break the ice a lot of time was covered in that one post, lol. Anyway, I wouldn't even worry about the girl from college, she was a college hook up nothing more, nothing less, and if you didn't lead her on or anything I wouldn't worry about her interfering with your life, or your girls life. If she does for some reason do something dumb and opens her mouth, I also wouldn't worry about it since you said you were open to your girlfriend about what went on at college and what not, so it's not like she's going to be blindsided by this girl coming out of nowhere and either talking smack about you, or confessing her love for you, and you truly love her and not your girlfriend, I mean you know the deal, lol. I don't think you have too much to really worry about, I hope things work out between you and your girlfriend though, separating and coming back to one another is a special thing. Good luck man. Hope this helps.

    -LCM
    rebeccahstrean's Avatar
    rebeccahstrean Posts: 165, Reputation: 9
    Junior Member
     
    #3

    Oct 18, 2010, 04:48 PM
    Well seemingly that you did just have sex with her and that was it... it most likely hurt her case she really liked you and she might just want to ruin the relationship you have now cause she wants you and doesn't want anyone else to have you. I would wait a while before contacting her... let her calm down and just get her head on straight and over you and then contact her.

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