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    keakloft's Avatar
    keakloft Posts: 14, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Sep 17, 2010, 11:14 AM
    Child Abandonment
    I am in search of guidance and direction. Any legal advice would be great! Parents who have been in similar situations, please give me your input as well!
    I have a beautiful 17 month old son whose father is MIA. His father has been inconsistent throughout the pregnancy and even more so since my son has been amongst the world. He was not at the birth of my son, which was in TN; however, he did come to the hospital the following Sunday. By his coming on Sunday, the administrator responsible for notarizing applications for birth certificates was not there so his signature on my son's birth certificate was null and void since we were not the nor ever married. We were given instructions on how to add him (the NCP) to the birth certificate, but he continually put it off so it never happened... Fast forward a few months, and I graduate from college and my son and I moved to GA with my mother. The NCP and I stayed in touch on an inconsistent basis, but little support was ever given. I asked for financial help on a regular basis but was always told a sob story of how he did not have any money to help, so I applied for child support through Gwinnet County in Aug 2009. To this day, Sept 2010, my application is still pending. I have harassed my assigned case worker in Gwinnett Co. but am continually told because this is an interstate case, Gwinnett Co. has to wait for Shelby Co. to do their part. So after about 4 months of waiting I contacted several Shelby Co. CS representatives to no avail. I was told that my case has finally been sent to the clerk's office for a court date, but it could take months before a date is set... I knew going into this that this would be a lengthy process, an I have been incredibly patient because although its been a struggle, I have had been employed and able to support my son. However, I recently dealt with a lay off and now I do not have the means to support my son alone.

    Going back in my story a little, for my son's first birthday, the NCP planned a weekend visit to GA to spend with my son. This was the first time they had seen each other since the baby was 6 weeks old... he arrived on Friday and was supposed to stay until Monday, however, Saturday morning while I was giving him directions to meet us at the barbershop from his hotel, he disconnected the line and vanished into thin air. I tried calling him throughout the day with no avail and by Monday even tried calling his parents. It was then that I was told that he "got frustrated because he was in an unfamiliar city and lost, so he just went back to Memphis." I have not talked to him again since. Up until that point I have always tried everything in my power to provide ways for him to be an active part of my son's life, both actively and financially, but those outlets were never taken advantage of. After the 1st birthday episode, I changed my number and cut ties. Then I thought about it and decided it was not in my power to deny him the right to reach out to his son, should he ever decide to. So I sent him a text and an email with my new contact info and have yet to hear anything from him... Thus my consideration od filing child abandonment charges against him.

    So to sum up my lengthy story above, my 2 questions are:
    1. What steps can I take to expedite my child support case?
    2. How do I file for child abandonment?
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #2

    Sep 17, 2010, 11:20 AM

    As far as child abandonment is concerned, have you read this - https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/family...st-364259.html. You are asked to read it before posting.

    Abandonment is leaving your child unattended at a bus stop - the father appears to be disinterested but I see no abandonment. The child lives safely with you.

    You have not waited an extraordinarily long period for support when different States are involved. The best you can do to expedite things is to stay in touch with the office in your area.

    You cannot force a person to be an interested parent and that is what this all comes down to. He wasn't interested during the pregnancy. He's not interested now.

    It's sad and stressful and frustrating but I have explained how the law works.

    At some point you may meet someone, marry, he will want to adopt your child, the birth father will give his consent and life will go on - hopefully. In the meantime, you cannot strip him of his parental rights BUT you also cannot force him to be an attentive (or even interested) father.
    GV70's Avatar
    GV70 Posts: 2,918, Reputation: 283
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    #3

    Sep 18, 2010, 06:07 PM

    Quote Originally Posted by keakloft View Post
    So to sum up my lengthy story above, my 2 questions are:
    1. What steps can I take to expedite my child support case?
    2. How do I file for child abandonment?
    1. You made a little mistake. You had to file in court for paternity and then child support would be ordered immediately. In order for the father to have rights to the child (including rights to custody or visitation),and to have child support obligations paternity must be admitted or established in court. Paternity can be established by: father's acknowledgment of paternity in writing/ Not your case/ or by judicial determination of paternity;
    2.Legally-he does not have neither rights nor obligations.Thus there is no abandonment...

    Quote Originally Posted by JudyKayTee View Post
    Abandonment is leaving your child unattended at a bus stop - the father appears to be disinterested but I see no abandonment. The child lives safely with you.
    19-10-1.
    (a) A child abandoned by its father or mother shall be considered to be in a dependent condition when the father or mother does not furnish sufficient food, clothing, or shelter for the needs of the child.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #4

    Sep 18, 2010, 06:15 PM

    Yes, abandonment in GA is the failure to pay court ordered child support, not being missing in action. In GA, a father who never sees the child and even never pays court ordered support can not lose his rights as a father.

    The issue
    1. believe hospital is at error since some births happen on weekends and mother and child gone by Monday morning, and father being there and had he signed in front of witness, it should have been valid ( that is a court issue to challenge the original birth certificate application being denied by hospital)

    2. you needed in TN to have filed for custody, filed to prove paternity and to have filed for child support.

    3. Also how long have you lived here in TN, if over 6 months you need to go to court, and file for custody, and for support and to have him proven the father by DNA.

    4. if he is out of state, and will not work with you, it still can be a long process, of court orders, contempt of court and more. ( assuming they can find him to serve him with papers)

    So no there is nothing else you can do and adbandonment as GA laws regulates it does not apply at this point and time
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #5

    Sep 18, 2010, 06:15 PM

    Georgia is one of a very few states that refers to failure to pay support as abandonment. But, since you already have a support case pending, filing for abandonment is moot.

    Have you applied for public assistance? If you haven't you should do so. That may help expedite the case as the state will want to get reimbursed.
    keakloft's Avatar
    keakloft Posts: 14, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Sep 18, 2010, 06:51 PM
    Thank you all for the great advice and input.

    1. I lived in TN for 16 years, I was there with my son for about 3 months before we moved to GA. I applied for child support in GA as instructed by both Shelby Co (TN) and Gwinnett Co (GA).

    2. I've tried applying for gov't assistance but was told my income was to high (which is frustrating because I was laid off). I only qualify for foodstamps and Medicare for the little one, which helps but isn't adding pressure to expedite my case.

    3. There was a nurse present when the NCp signed the hospital birth certificate, but I was told that since it wasn't notarized, we'd have to take additional steps to make it official. I have a copy of the hospital version but the official copy doesn't have his name on it.

    4. As far as paternity testing is concerned, how do I go about that legally? I attempted to do it out of pocket but the NCP would not cooperate. I'm under the impression that by filing for child support a paternity test is done automatically... If this isn't so, how should I approach this?
    keakloft's Avatar
    keakloft Posts: 14, Reputation: 1
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    #7

    Sep 18, 2010, 07:02 PM
    Also, while completing the child support app, I gave all of his current info (work add, home add, ssn, parents add, even his vehicle registration #) there shouldn't be a problem with locating him.

    I'm not interested in terminating his parental rights. I just want him to be responsible for his child even if it has to be forced by the courts...

    How and where do I file for legal guardianship of my son?
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #8

    Sep 18, 2010, 07:06 PM

    You need to file in family court for child support. And get a judge to order a DNA test to prove paternity.

    Child support enforcement can try to do some of this, but unless the county up there ( and you are not living there and they often care less) are willing to help, they are over worked enforcing people who have court orders.

    But yes you can follow the route you are doing, but you may never get it done.

    In your area there is a legal aid office for the county that will give you help in the legal filings.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #9

    Sep 18, 2010, 07:08 PM

    You are legal guardian by default.

    You need to pursue the child support case, that's your only answer.
    GV70's Avatar
    GV70 Posts: 2,918, Reputation: 283
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    #10

    Sep 18, 2010, 07:38 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by keakloft View Post
    There was a nurse present when the NCp signed the hospital birth certificate, but I was told that since it wasn't notarized, we'd have to take additional steps to make it official. I have a copy of the hospital version but the offical copy doesn't have his name on it.
    Thus his acknowledgment is not valid.

    Quote Originally Posted by keakloft View Post
    I'm under the impression that by filing for child support a paternity test is done automatically...
    Correct-but you was able to shorten it.
    keakloft's Avatar
    keakloft Posts: 14, Reputation: 1
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    #11

    Sep 18, 2010, 07:52 PM
    Comment on GV70's post
    Thank you.
    cdad's Avatar
    cdad Posts: 12,700, Reputation: 1438
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    #12

    Sep 18, 2010, 07:53 PM

    Part of the problem with this whole thing is that when you moved you really weren't allowed to file for child support there in Ga until you qualified as a legal resident (usually 6 months) so in filing when you did they had to wait to do anything with it.
    keakloft's Avatar
    keakloft Posts: 14, Reputation: 1
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    #13

    Sep 18, 2010, 08:04 PM
    @ ScottGem: Thank you. I asked my child support case worker and she said the same thing. The only reason I'm remotely concerned about guardianship is because I met a women who was orderedby the court to give full guardianship to her teenage daughter's father on what she described as a technicality. She did not have court ordered guardianship of her daughter and the father was paying court ordered child support. The mother left the child with her grandmother for a week while she came to GA in search of a new home. The father took the mother to court saying she abandoned the child and the courts ruled in his favor because, according to the mother, she didn't have legal guardianship and she moved to an area when she did not have any family or support system, whereas the father was surrounded by family. BTW, this all took place in OH, so I'm not sure what the laws are up there...
    GV70's Avatar
    GV70 Posts: 2,918, Reputation: 283
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    #14

    Sep 18, 2010, 08:11 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by keakloft View Post
    The only reason I'm remotely concerned about guardianship is because I met a women who was orderedby the court to give full gaurdianship to her teenage daughter's father on what she discribed as a technicality. She did not have court ordered gaurdianship of her daughter and the father was paying court ordered child support. The mother left the child with her grandmother for a week while she came to GA in search of a new home. The father took the mother to court saying she abandoned the child and the courts ruled in his favor because, according to the mother, she didn't have legal gaurdianship and she moved to an area when she did not have any family or support system, whereas the father was surrounded by family. BTW, this all took place in OH, so I'm not sure what the laws are up there...
    Oh.NOOOO!
    3111.01 Parent and child relationship defined.

    (A) As used in sections 3111.01 to 3111.85 of the Revised Code, “parent and child relationship” means the legal relationship that exists between a child and the child's natural or adoptive parents and upon which those sections and any other provision of the Revised Code confer or impose rights, privileges, duties, and obligations. The “parent and child relationship” includes the mother and child relationship and the father and child relationship.

    (B) The parent and child relationship extends equally to all children and all parents, regardless of the marital status of the parents.

    3111.02 Establishing parent and child relationship.
    (A) The parent and child relationship between a child and the child's natural mother may be established by proof of her having given birth to the child or pursuant to sections 3111.01 to 3111.18 or 3111.20 to 3111.85 of the Revised Code. The parent and child relationship between a child and the natural father of the child may be established by an acknowledgment of paternity as provided in sections 3111.20 to 3111.35 of the Revised Code, and pursuant to sections 3111.01 to 3111.18 or 3111.38 to 3111.54 of the Revised Code. The parent and child relationship between a child and the adoptive parent of the child may be established by proof of adoption or pursuant to Chapter 3107. Of the Revised Code.

    3109.042 Custody rights of unmarried mother.

    An unmarried female who gives birth to a child is the sole residential parent and legal custodian of the child until a court of competent jurisdiction issues an order designating another person as the residential parent and legal custodian. A court designating the residential parent and legal custodian of a child described in this section shall treat the mother and father as standing upon an equality when making the designation.
    The reason was not she did not have guardianship;)
    GV70's Avatar
    GV70 Posts: 2,918, Reputation: 283
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    #15

    Sep 18, 2010, 08:21 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by keakloft View Post
    according to the mother, she didn't have legal gaurdianship
    Actually the parents have natural guardianship.
    A parent may be a legal guardian only if the child is 18+ and disabled/incompetent.
    GV70's Avatar
    GV70 Posts: 2,918, Reputation: 283
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    #16

    Sep 18, 2010, 08:40 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by califdadof3 View Post
    Part of the problem with this whole thing is that when you moved you really werent allowed to file for child support there in Ga until you qualified as a legal resident (usually 6 months) so in filing when you did they had to wait to do anything with it.
    I think it should not be a part of the problem. The OP contacted DCSE ,the OP did not file in Ga court.
    Here the problem is: the OP applied for child support through County X . The office workers wasted some months to get in touch with some office workers in county Y... The office workers in County Y wasted some months to settle the case in Court and so on...
    "The home state" has jurisdiction over the custody and child support modifications but not over establishing child support.
    cdad's Avatar
    cdad Posts: 12,700, Reputation: 1438
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    #17

    Sep 19, 2010, 03:28 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by GV70 View Post
    I think it should not be a part of the problem. The OP contacted DCSE ,the OP did not file in Ga court.
    Here the problem is: the OP applied for child support through County X . The office workers wasted some months to get in touch with some office workers in county Y...The office workers in County Y wasted some months to settle the case in Court and so on....
    "The home state" has jurisdiction over the custody and child support modifications but not over establishing child support.
    Here is where the timeline is as quoted by the OP.

    " 1. I lived in TN for 16 years, I was there with my son for about 3 months before we moved to GA. I applied for child support in GA as instructed by both Shelby Co (TN) and Gwinnett Co (GA). "




    So they did cross state lines to file. If that is what happened then it may have caused a delay in actions by the child support people. That is one reason for things taking longer then normal. The rest is the dealings with crossing state lines. That alone can take longer to get action in support cases. Yet another delay.
    keakloft's Avatar
    keakloft Posts: 14, Reputation: 1
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    #18

    Sep 19, 2010, 03:58 AM
    Comment on GV70's post
    Oh OK, thanks!
    keakloft's Avatar
    keakloft Posts: 14, Reputation: 1
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    #19

    Sep 19, 2010, 04:06 AM
    Comment on califdadof3's post
    Ok, thanks.
    keakloft's Avatar
    keakloft Posts: 14, Reputation: 1
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    #20

    Sep 19, 2010, 04:43 AM
    Comment on GV70's post
    Thank you for that clarification.

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