[agent.zero]

Hey guys, like the title says, my girlfriend and I broke up a few days ago, and I did some crazy stuff to win her back the next day. She finally agreed to take me back after a long day of me trying to prove myself to her. I was elated beyond words, and set out to be a brand new person.

We decided to start over in terms of the relationship, and it's been kind of tough since she is not being as affectionate as she was before we broke up. I get it that right now, she wants to keep some distance but at times she just feels really cold. Should I just do the best I can to deal with that and gradually work the relationship back to what it was before?

The basics of the cause of the break up was that: I did not do much for her as a boyfriend, I tried, but it wasn't all I could have done. There is also some problem with this, as if I do too much right now it would just seem like I'm only trying to make up for before. I really don't know what to do, I really don't want to lose this girl again but it feels like I have to do as much as I can.

Thanks for any advice/help

[talaniman]

She took you back, but how did you both resolve what broke you up??

[BMI]

Wow!

That is some transformation in what, a few days?

[redhed35]

This is probably not what you want to hear,but you might just have worn her down.

Instead of a day spent proving yourself,it was probably a day where she thought is this ever going to be over!

It ended,you got her back,either through emotional blackmail or as I said just wore her down.

She does not sound very happy to be back in the relationship.

If she ended it the first time,she wanted out,her feeling had changed towards you.

Emotions as you know are not light switches,cant be turned off and on at will.

Talk to her about how she is really feeling about getting back together,only she knows how she really feels and what is it she expects this time around.

If she is willing to give it another shot,you both need to talk about what has to change.

[agent.zero]

There was really a lot of problems, from small things to big things. It really stemmed from the basic fact that I wasn't a good boyfriend, I didn't do much for her, though I did try.

I guess I convinced her that I would be different, but I know that this is always not the very best way. I changed into someone that I wasn't after meeting her and I promised that I would go back to being who I was before meeting her, and she said that was who she fell in love with.


Both of us were wore down, from all the fighting and what was going on. The actual break up was a wake-up call to me to start being a boyfriend, instead of sitting in the driver's seat and taking everything for granted. We have talked about what has to change, but I feel like if I keep going on about it, I will just sound like a broken record. Doesn't my actions tell her more about me than my words?

[lickemlolly]

She is probably skeptical that things are not going to change.. or they will only change for a little while then revert back to the way they used to be...

[silverlining]

Yes actions will speak louder than words so stop saying and do whatever it is you have to do to be a good boyfriend.. With time things will settle down and you will get the relationship back on track but this will take time and you have to stick to it..