[Crystal5164]

Moved to its own thread


I start hanging out with this guy I knew in college. We were good friends and we really liked each other, things didn't work because we were too young... 5 years later... we spent the entire day together, had an amazing time. I hear from him every day for the next week. He calls. Really moving forward emotionally I think... spend time together the next weekend and we make out, but I didn't want to go to far. Hang out the next weekend. It goes further... never slept with him. I stop hearing from him so much and he is suddenly very busy. I ask him if things are different and he says no, and when I ask him how he things of us its "two kids having fun" and he doesn't want a relationship right now because he just got out of one... understandable, but what happened! Did he always just want me to be his friends with benefits? Did I let too much happen before there was a commitment, so now he thinks Im easy and not relationship worthy? Did he just realize what he wants? Or did I ruin it?

[talaniman]

Take it at face value, and just have fun getting reacquainted and not have such high expectations. He could well be backing off to a safe emotional distance, maybe to draw YOU into initiating more, hard to say.

Making out may be normal for you, but maybe having sex to soon would be jumping the gun. So relax, and just be two kids having fun.

How long has he been out of his previous relationship? He may be indeed healing, and needs more time, and space to be ready for another.

[Fr_Chuck]

It is what it is, very likely he will never give you what you want a straight answer.

He may have been looking for someone just to have sex with, and you were not getting there on his time frame. He may have been reliving some old times.

And he may just not be ready for long term relationship