[likey]

My girlfriend and I haven't had sex for nearly two months.we are together nearly three years and didn't have full sex for the first year as she is hiv positive and I had fears.
We met with the appropriate experts and began a nice safe sex life.she had been in a very abusive relationship before me and for the first year and a half of our relationship clung to me.I encouraged her to follow her dream of music.she has done.now she has told me it must come first now.I think she should follow her dream and she is working hard but at my expense.I would never come between her and her dream but I mentioned the sex thing and she said she had no libido.it would not have been mentioned if I had not asked.lately we are not getting on she says "she can be a at times and thats it"
She says she makes me miserable and she can't bear it.I frankly think it's a cop out,I feel used and if she makes me miserable why doesn't she try fight for me instead of saying well that's the way it is.. I would love your views though right now I think I need to respect myself and put me first.im so angry,I told her go for it now I'm an expendable item.well I have dreams but I need someone to love me physically as well as emotionally.

[Cat1864]

How old are you? How old is she?

She's HIV positive. How many drugs is she on? Even after meeting with the experts, etc. is she still afraid of transmitting the disease to you? Could a fear of pregnancy be lurking in her mind? Is she on some type of hormonal birth control? Has she gotten counseling for the abusive relationship? All of those and more could be factors in her not having (or being afraid to have) an interest in sex.

How is her health? The sad part is she may have years or she may not.

It sounds like you are both on different paths. Let her go. Give yourself time to heal then find someone who can share your dreams and help you realize them.

[likey]

Hi I'm 30 and she is 27.her health is great thank god and isn't on medication as of yet.no pregnancy fears or hormonal influences.its funny at the beginning it was me who was hesitant
Until we spoke to the experts.I think after so long wanting me to be true to her that now she can see I actually am she is scared and wants to run?not sure.I feel bad discussing this now.just the fact that she was happy to ignore it and now is kind of saying it may be a phase and may not hurts.
She says she is thinking of me and being honest.I am really being selfish but I sometimes feel she owes me enough to step up to the plate for me and try and resolve this.