[JK191]

I used to love masturbating but ever since I've had the second surgery on my penis (first time was a phimosis so just had a circumcision) to fix some complications (it was far too bent) I haven't been able to pleasure myself.

It's been 6 months since the surgery and my penis has been fine for 4 but, it just feels like I'm masturbating someone else and I can't even bring myself to look at it sometimes. It just doesn't feel like it's a part of me anymore and I don't know, this leaves me frustrated because apart from not having any sex I can't get any sexual release.

Basically, what happens is, I try to masturbate (I get an erection from pornography or thinking about a certain girl in a certain way) and as soon as I even feel my penis in my hand I just lose my erection cause it feels like someone else's.

I have no idea what I can do about this and it's seriously frustating.

[QLP]

You mention in another post that you are planning on seeing a therapist with some other problems you are having. I think you need to bring this problem into the discussion too.

People who have had any kind of surgery, have to deal with the problem of recovering from the 'assault' of the surgery. Yes we know logically that it was done for a good reason but it can still feel like an assault on the body.

In addition when the appearance or feel of any body part is changed there is a massive emotional challenge in learning to accept and identify with a new body image.

When the surgery is on the sexual organs then difficulties with some aspect of sex often also occur.

Please don't think your reaction is weird, it is actually very normal for someone who is in your situation. Do talk about this with your therapist who will be able to help you work on this.

[Fr_Chuck]

Yes, therapy is called for, not sure other issues, but if you have a girlfriend, do you have the same problem with someone else doing it ?


Also no one ever died from not getting a sexual release.

[JK191]

yes, therapy is called for, not sure other issues, but if you have a girlfriend, do you have the same problem with someone else doing it ?


Also no one ever died from not getting a sexual release.

When I did have a girlfriend I didn't have a problem with her doing it to me no.

[JK191]

Sorry to bring this question up again, but it's been 3 months and I'm extremely annoyed by this issue. No, therapy hasn't helped with it one bit. Does anyone have any feedback on possible solutions?

[CravenMorhead]

So what it sounds like here is that you're used to your old penis. As soon as your grab your penis now you think, "This isn't old faithful. If this isn't old faithful than it is someone else's penis! OH GOD! I am not teh ghey! I can't touch another man's penis." Forgive the colloquialisms.

The problem is completely mental at this point but it isn't something that a therapist can really help you with. You need to get used to your penis again.

I would go out to a Adult Toy Store and get a masturbatory aid. A fleshlight is an example. It put a barrier between your hand and your penis. It will allow you to pleasure yourself without feeling like your jerking off another man.

Do you understand where I am going with this?

Good luck.

[JK191]

So what it sounds like here is that you're used to your old penis. As soon as your grab your penis now you think, "This isn't old faithful. If this isn't old faithful than it is someone else's penis! OH GOD! I am not teh ghey! I can't touch another man's penis." Forgive the colloquialisms.

The problem is completely mental at this point but it isn't something that a therapist can really help you with. You need to get used to your penis again.

I would go out to a Adult Toy Store and get a masturbatory aid. A fleshlight is an example. It put a barrier between your hand and your penis. It will allow you to pleasure yourself without feeling like your jerking off another man.

Do you understand where I am going with this?

Good luck.

I do understand and I must admit I did giggle at the opening statement.

Perhaps I'll try that, thank you.