[lookingfoward]

I live in FL. I am the breadwinner in my family ($80k) with no college degree. Spouse has BA and teaches at a private school ($37K) We've been married 8 yrs. I have a job that involves some traveling. While it's not extensive it is becoming a concern. I presented my spouse with an offer of divorce three months ago w/ no response. We are still residing in the same house, amicably (I am very good at putting on a happy face and being polite and personable for the sake of our daughter) but, I am just trying to get through the holidays and will be filing through our local county courthouse after the New Year. I have several business trips I will have to take in the coming months that will have me out of town for anywhere between 2 and 4 days each. If I averaged out the amount of days I've been out of town over the last 365 days it's about 3 1/2 days per month. My questions are: (1) I offered joint custody of our 4 year old daughter but how will/if my travel effect this. (My spouse is a rather unpredictable person and is sometimes level-headed and other times very hot-headed) should my spouse go the hot-headed route and fight for custody, will my travel be an issue with joint custody? Also my spouse has repeatedly told me during disagreements that "I would be taken to the cleaners" and have to pay alimony. I find this a little unbelievable because my spouse has a BA degree (not in education but rather journalism/english w/ a minor in Business Mgmt.) but has chosen a profession for the last 5 years that does not pay well. Would I really have to pay alimony? I would think a judge would tell my spouse that due to the level of education that perhaps my spouse should find a better paying job. Any and all comments are appreciated. Thank you.

[ScottGem]

Joint custody means that you have a say in how the child is raised. So your travel issues should not affect that. What you are concerned about is visitation and physical custody. As part of the divorce you will work out a schedule of when your daughter will live with you. You should try to build in as much flexibility into that schedule as possible.

I would think a judge would tell my spouse that due to the level of education that perhaps my spouse should find a better paying job.

BOY are you living in a fantasy world. Yes you will most likely have to pay alimony and definitely child support. Your wife doesn't have to work at all if she doesn't want to. The only way you might escape alimony is if you can prove your wife was at fault in the divorce (i.e. infidelty).

[s_cianci]

Well, it's not likely that any judge would tell your spouse to find a better paying job just based on his education. He's been at his current position for 5 years. Actually, $37K isn't bad for a private school teacher in Florida, even though you make twice that amount. He could maybe make more in a public school but he doesn't have an education degree so he's not qualified to do that. Having a major in journalism/english with a minor in Business Management doesn't suggest too many jobs that he could get that pay substantially more than what he's getting now. If he had a medical or law degree, that might be a different story. But yes, given the circumstances, be prepared to possibly have to pay some alimony for at least the first few years. As for the custody issue, if you are in fact only away 3 1/2 days out of each month then I don't think your travel will be an issue. But if he wants joint custody he'll probably get it. You don't elaborate specifically why you want this divorce but, as a couple with a combined yearly income of $117K and one daughter, in an area known for its low cost of living, you may find that a divorce really isn't worth it.