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    dgomez's Avatar
    dgomez Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    May 26, 2010, 09:48 PM
    What to do , my stepson has touched his sister
    A couple days ago my husband walked in and found my 15 year old and 10 year old alone in the bedroom when he asked what they were doing , they were acting weird. So I had a talk with my 10 year old she told me they have kissed and when she pushed him away he got mad. When my husband talked to him , he blamed it on her that she seduced him. I don't know what to do my stepson says he doesn't want to talk anymore about, but I need to know what happened.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #2

    May 27, 2010, 08:25 AM

    This is something you and your husband discuss, as to how to move forward. A professional should be consulted as soon as possible to guide YOU and your husband before you proceed further.

    You can get a referral for a consultation from your family doctor, or your local mental health facility.
    Kitkat22's Avatar
    Kitkat22 Posts: 6,302, Reputation: 1191
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    #3

    Jul 1, 2010, 11:38 AM
    He's much to old to be around this child. See that he gets counseling before it goes beyond touching. You are the mother of this girl. It's up to you to protect her. Get him help!!
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #4

    Jul 1, 2010, 12:05 PM

    First, remember these are not blood relatives. Second, kissing is not inappropriate touching. Your subject says "touched" but you only spoke of kissing.

    It is however inappropriate for a 15 yr old to kiss a 10 yr old or vice versa. But you don't need to know the details about what happened unless there was inappropriate touching involved. What you do need is to get them BOTH into counseling.
    Jake2008's Avatar
    Jake2008 Posts: 6,721, Reputation: 3460
    Emotional Health Expert
     
    #5

    Jul 4, 2010, 08:52 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by dgomez View Post
    A couple days ago my husband walked in and found my 15 year old and 10 year old alone in the bedroom when he asked what they were doing , they were acting weird. So I had a talk with my 10 year old she told me they have kissed and when she pushed him away he got mad. When my husband talked to him , he blamed it on her that she seduced him. I don't know what to do my stepson says he doesn't wanna talk anymore about, but I need to know what happened.
    I don't blame you for being alarmed.

    I am confused as well about what you mean by 'touching', if it was a kiss and nothing else.

    It is inappropriate that they were alone together in a bedroom, 'acting weird' as your husband said.

    Your daughter has said that when they kissed, she pushed him away, and that got him mad. That to me indicates that he had an agenda. Also, the 15 year old boy knows that kissing his sister is inappropriate, and his reaction confirms that. At least in my book.

    If the 15 year old is to be believed, it was your 10 year old daughter that seduced him. His refusal to talk about it should not be an option.

    Regardless of all that you know to be factual, it is imperative that you get all into counselling. Silence has to be broken, rules and boundaries have to be set. Refusal to deal with the issues as a family, and with the two individuals involved, may be setting a precident for future behaviour problems.

    For some reason the 15 year old has exhibited behaviour that has resulted in him being alone with, and kissing (or touching as you say in your question), your 10 year old daughter.

    In my opinion, if these were my children, I would very clearly let it be known that it will all be dealt with appropriately, not covered up and forgotten about.

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