[imsosorrygirl]

So I was dating this guy for 8 months. This guy was way different than any other guy I've ever liked or dated. He was way sweet, super nice, completely romantic, and so much fun to be around.
When we first started dating, things were a little rough because my ex was still bugging me. Well eventually we got past that and by the 2nd or 3rd month we fell in love completely. It's always hard for me to say "i love you" but it was even harder to say "i'm in love with you." I didn't feel pressured to say it or anything and I really was in love with him when I said it to him.
Everything was perfect. I was going to college and he was still in high school and we still managed to see each other all the time. We didn't have to do anything romantic or anything like that. We could have fun no matter what we did. We could go to the store and have fun or just sit at home and talk for hours. Everything was perfect.
After our 8 month anniversary he started acting a little different. I asked him if everything was OK and he said you of course. Well everything wasn't OK. I don't know what happened or whatever but he wanted a break. I thought it would be best for him and he was all that mattered so I agreed to the break. Well the day after we decided that he came to my house begging for me back. Of course I said yes and everything seemed to go back to normal. We were having fun and pretended like nothing ever happened.
The week of my birthday he broke up with me.
I don't know what happened and I don't know why. It's been about 4 months and I'm still not over him. He never talks to me ever and he just acts like him and I never even happened. I don't know what to do...
All of my friends are telling me to move on but my heart is telling me to stay. I'm tired of listening to my heart because it only causes trouble it seems, but I still can't let go.
I'm stressing myself out over this whole thing. On top of all of that, I'm still in love with him. I don't know what to do next...

[bloooooper7]

Can't really be happy until you've made a better life for yourself then you had with the guy. It sucks believe me I know but you can't hold onto something that's gone.

The best way to look at it is finding yourself again. If I were to ask you before you met him if you needed his existence in your life to be happy you'd probably laugh at me right?

Have to put him out of your mind.. Out of sight - Out of mind = No problem.

For me I made a whole new life... New friends new hobbies. I'm happy... Stuff still reminds me of her and it hurts but that doesn't happen so much.

Things only get better after you accept its over right. Everything will be OK :).

[kp2171]

This sounds dumb, but you are young and he is young and... I'm sorry... young love often doesn't last.

Hell... older love often doesn't last.

But its not a cop out saying that you're both young... some loves are meant for a time, but not all time... and my experience is the younger you are, the more you are side swiped with a feeling of what-the-hell-just-happened?

I don't know.

Maybe I just think you step in dog poo enough times, you start to know what happened.

Well... it fell apart. It happens. And sometimes there isn't a rational bit o' evidence to make sense of it...

And of course there are people 20 and 30 years older than you going through the same noise... don't mean to say that people don't get side swiped as they get more experienced... but really... my experience personally and in talking to others is that what you are going through isn't all that uncommon.

You are unsettled in part because you don't understand what happened and its tough to move on when you don't know why you should... those who have had to work through this a few times spent less time on the "why"... and just accept the "it is"...

I've had my heart broken by three Big Loves. Really big loves. Years spent together.

And while each break was bigger and more painful in succession in some ways... I was more adept at dealing with it with each break. Again... in time, you learn to trust that you can pick yourself up and move on when things go off the track. It happens.

It happened to you. You might not ever get the real answer to "why"... and while that's hard to accept, it might be the reality you need to live in. it might not matter why he flaked out... he did. And the next love you have will not be him... so whatever spooked him or whatever was "off" with him doesn't translate to your next love...

And that's a big thing to accept... you next love shouldn't suffer for the faults of your last one... so why should the reasons for your last break doom the next one?

Blame the boy. Move on. *poof* problem solved. ;)

[talaniman]

Whenever young people say how in love they are with each other, then things don't work out, it usually means one partner assumes that the other feels the same as they do. Its seldom that way, and maybe he was not as in love as you were.

You had great fun for a while, but that party is over now. So let it go, and get ready for the next one, as you are young, and have many parties to go to, and much more fun, and heartbreaks yet to come. I think you may have gotten pretty use to him rather quickly, and that happens when times are good, and its so sad when they end while your having a good time, without any major conflicts, to give you warning, so of course you were caught off guard.

Time to get your life back, and enjoy yourself with others, and soon you will smile at the fun you had, and be having even more, as you recover.

[Ther4peuticH3at]

No matter what, the best thing you can do is follow the NC rules, and move on with yourself. You can do that. It's not insurmountable.

Even if you've searched yourself and still feel like you still want him back, the BEST thing you can do is let him go and hope that maybe he comes back to you (and maybe does a little growing up on the way). It wouldn't be right any other way.

[Torrid13]

Wow, it feels good to be back after a long & hectic school year.

Ok, imsosorrygirl, I'm going to pretty much restate what KP said. There will be many, many times when the "Why?!" question will never be answered, simply because there IS no answer.

Boys are goobers, and sometimes THEY don't even know why they don't want to be with someone anymore. They just don't feel like it, and that's that. So, they will avoid talking to you to avoid answering questions to avoid drama, etc.

Bottom line is that you probably did nothing wrong. You fell for an immature guy. Keep yourself busy with school & things you like to do, and in time, you will heal.

Just don't beat yourself up. It happens to even the best of us. There's a handsome, infinitely more mature man out there for you. Be patient. He'll find you.