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    basquiat's Avatar
    basquiat Posts: 12, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #1

    Apr 23, 2010, 05:55 PM
    Returning to Church after long Absence
    How do you return to church life after a long absence due to Major Hurts form so called Christians?. i.e, How do you cope with being judged, as most Christians think because you've left church, you've left God. But so many christians live on the fringes with their love for God in tact, It's like Gandhi said:"I like your Christ, but not your Christians, they are so unchrist like".
    Don't get me wrong, I Know that christians are not perfect (just like me) But It was people in LEADERSHIP that really got to me, I stuck it out for 10years simply because they would say "If I left it would be rebelling against God, & If I didn't follow their advice... I'd be rebelling against etc... So you can see how easily someone who's wanting to please God can get sucked into that. I have not been to church for about 8-9years & just started going to a different church... but it is difficult...
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
    Jobs & Parenting Expert
     
    #2

    Apr 23, 2010, 06:02 PM

    If they are really Christians, they will welcome you into their midst, no questions asked. (You don't have to explain or apologize to them.) If it's the same church you left and the members judge you or make rude comments, move on to a different church.
    classyT's Avatar
    classyT Posts: 1,562, Reputation: 214
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    #3

    Apr 23, 2010, 06:51 PM

    Bas,

    In my opinion, being hurt by a fellow brother or sister in Christ hurts the worst. It is a spiritual hurt but the Lord understands the exact pain you are going through... check it out:

    Psalms 55:12-14
    12If an enemy were insulting me,

    I could endure it;

    If a foe were raising himself against me,

    I could hide from him.

    13But it is you, a man like myself,

    My companion, my close friend,
    14with whom I once enjoyed sweet fellowship
    As we walked with the throng at the house of God

    The Lord understand your pain. AND if I read my Bible correctly( and I do) HE is the HEAD of the church. If HE can forgive being PERFECT, than who are they to stand in judgement. Find another church. A local church should be a hospital for sinners.. NOT a showcase for saints. :)
    dwashbur's Avatar
    dwashbur Posts: 1,456, Reputation: 175
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    #4

    Apr 23, 2010, 07:04 PM

    It's often been said that the Christian church is the only army that shoots its wounded. But there are good congregations out there; you just have to kiss a few frogs before you find a prince (or princess as the case may be). Shop around some, and don't give up. I'm kind of in a similar boat myself right now, having just relocated for the gazillionth time.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
    Expert
     
    #5

    Apr 23, 2010, 07:20 PM

    You go for yourself, not for what anyone else thinks or says. If you allow someone else to get in your way between God and you, then that is your issue, not the other people.s
    450donn's Avatar
    450donn Posts: 1,821, Reputation: 239
    Ultra Member
     
    #6

    Apr 23, 2010, 07:25 PM

    Too many church goers are too judgmental. Churches do not judge. Church goers do. So pick a church where you are welcomed with no questions asked. We have been members of one such church. It is a place who's mission is welcoming all who are hurting and offering help to anyone who asks. Start shopping until you find one. I know is some areas this may be difficult, but I would be willing to bet there is one within driving distance.
    Kitkat22's Avatar
    Kitkat22 Posts: 6,302, Reputation: 1191
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    #7

    Apr 23, 2010, 07:41 PM
    I feel bad even addressing this post because I am one of those

    Imperfect Christians. Being hurt by the people in Church is similar

    To a broken relationship with a family member. It hurts your heart.

    But Christ is the Church and he is the one we build on. A few

    Years ago my husband and I were in a wonderful Church.. You

    Could feel the spirit of the Lord when you walked in the door.

    The Church had begun to grow and we hardly missed a service.

    Then the members wanted to build a fellowship hall and that's the

    Story.. some wanted it... some didn't. The Church was divided and it

    Was so divided.. it wasn't ever the same again. It broke our hearts

    But we found another Church and began to like it. Soon after the

    Pastor said he didn't believe in women wearing pants to church.

    Once again another split. We left and have visited other Churches

    Sporadically.. but I have never gotten over the hurt Christians can

    Cause each other. The Bible says.. "Fail not to assemble thy selves

    together." and it also says, "Come together in one mind and one

    accord". When you've been hurt that's hard to do. I still don't

    The Lord doesn't cause discord in Church. Don't look to people the

    In Church, people will disappoint you. Don't put your faith in

    Man, cause man will disappoint you. God will never let you down.

    I say things and act in ways that are not Christ like everyday.

    That's because I'm not perfect.. but I am forgiven. Forgive those

    Who hurt you... just as Jesus forgave the very one's who nailed

    Him to the cross. God Bless You and Please Pray For Me as I will

    Be praying for you. We are children of God.. even though we are

    So imperfect I wonder sometimes how he could love someone like

    Me.. but he does and he loves you. Ask God to lead you in finding

    Another Church. He will... Blessings:)
    arcura's Avatar
    arcura Posts: 3,773, Reputation: 191
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    #8

    Apr 26, 2010, 09:59 PM

    basquiat,
    You have been given advice to shop around and it is good advice.
    Finding the right one for you may be difficult but as the bible says persevere.
    Keep trying it will be worth the effort to you.
    Peace and kindness,
    Fred

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