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    nancylayne69's Avatar
    nancylayne69 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Apr 20, 2010, 01:38 AM
    How to deal with alcoholic adult child
    My 18 year old daughter received a dwi a month ago and is pending a court date. She is away at college and will be coming home for summer break. I do not want to enable her drinking. Before she comes come I want to let her know that she can come home only if she agrees that she will not drink otherwise must live elsewhere. Can I do this?
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,490, Reputation: 2853
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    #2

    Apr 20, 2010, 05:42 AM

    Yes you CAN do this. Its YOUR house. And be prepared to stand behind your decision. And toss her out if she doesn't follow your rules.

    She's legally an adult... You don't have to put up with anything you don't like in your own house. You can put her out on her own.

    Her house her rules... your house, your rules.
    Jake2008's Avatar
    Jake2008 Posts: 6,721, Reputation: 3460
    Emotional Health Expert
     
    #3

    Apr 20, 2010, 07:46 AM

    I think that depends on a little more information.

    Did she ever have a drinking problem in your home? Have you known her to come home drunk, and hungover for 2 days?

    Or was it more that she's at college, and overdid it one night, got the DWI, is remorseful, and has learned a hard lesson.

    I know many who do not have alcohol problems but drink on occasion, who have also had DWI's. In other words, she does not necessarily have a problem with alcohol, because she got caught once.

    I once walked out of a store with items I did not pay for, only because I was distracted with my baby at the time, and was absolutely mortified when I was approached. Did that make me a shoplifter?

    If you are placing demands that don't fit the 'crime', you may be over reacting, and she will spend less time at home.
    rabbitrun's Avatar
    rabbitrun Posts: 1, Reputation: 0
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    #4

    Nov 23, 2012, 02:29 PM
    She is not an alcoholic just because she got a drunk driving. It happens to the best of them. She is a college student and getting her life in order. Give her a break. She sounds like a good girl Don't lable her already. I know a district attorney who is still working in that field who got 4 dui's. He is not an alcoholic just a dumb thinker when it comes to driving and drinking. It only takes one to get a dui. Let her finish college and be a young girl who is learning about life. She sounds like a nice girl. Give her a break MOM. Let her experience life on her own with your guidance.

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