[CrissyDi]

I love nursing my baby... and at 7, almost 8 months, he still doesn't have any teeth. Kai always wants to come to me and we take naps together and cuddle together... that's a special time he will never have with anyone else. I give him formula bottles in the evening so he will rest longer and sometimes during the day if Im feeling tapped out. But mostly, he loves nursing over the bottle because of time we share. He doesn't care for a pacifier and will often want to nurse for a few moments just to help him get to sleep. Bad habit? Maybe But priceless time together.

Nursing is time consuming and quite draining. I work and I often feel tired. I don't take my vitamins regularly (I must admit! After 10 months of biting the bullet, I needed some reprieve.) I feel as though I don't have enough time for ME. Saying that feels so selfish, yet I know that I have to take care of myself to take care of him and hubby. Speaking of hubby, I feel as though I cannot give him all the time and attention I desire because my plate of responsibility is so full. Intimate time is lacking because I am tired, he's even tired, AND I am devastated over the state of my post pregnancy body. My breasts are large and saggy, my stomach is full of stretch marks and looks like a deflated balloon. My whole body lacks the elasticity it once had. I eat pretty healthy, except the occasional chick-fil-a run and the answered cravings for chocolate icecream. But with my work schedule and hubby's work schedule, I have no time for working out. I work from 7-2:30 and he works form 2- 10 pm. He watches the baby until 1pm and drops him off to my friend just before going into work. I pick him up right when I get off because my friend must leave to pick up her husband from work at 3pm. I feel as though if I weren't nursing, I could go back to a high protein/low carb diet that has always given me success in the past. I am 10lbs away from prepregnancy weight (gained 60lbs) and desire to loose an extra 15- 20 to get back to my weight before the birth control sent my body out of control.

So with all of this I question whether it's time to give up nursing so that I have more time for hubby, for life, for myself. But once I make the decision, I don't want to be laden with guilt.

What do you think? When do you truly know it's time?

[DoulaLC]

You've done an amazing job Crissy!

Unfortunately only you can decide when to end the breastfeeding relationship. If you are torn between wanting to stop and continuing, maybe look at a third option... it sounds as if the bulk of his feeding is with formula so maybe just wean down to once or twice a day (maybe just at naptime and/or bedtime for a bit) to continue the emotional connection with some breast milk still being provided.
This will allow you to have that closeness you both enjoy, but also let you regain some of the connection with your husband. Your work schedules don't allow for much together time so you will have to carve it out where you can find it... make that a priority! Dropping the breastfeeds a bit more will also let you get back to working out... take him for long walks at a decent pace, find a good workout DVD to use while he naps, park farther away in parking lots when you shop so that you have to walk a bit, use stairs instead of elevators whenever possible, make any housecleaning chores into workouts as you move and stretch about, do crunches, pushups, tricep dips, etc. during commercial breaks when you watch TV, wherever you can find some time to get moving... anything will put you on the right path to getting back into shape. Check out weight watchers for a few tips, they have a great program for breastfeeding mothers. You can pick what you feel will work for you. With the limited amount of nursing you would be doing you don't have to be as concerned about your intake for breastfeeding purposes. He will be fine... :) Everyone wins... you and Kai have that special bond for awhile longer still and you both still get some breastfeeding benefits... you can have some time for hubby and yourself... and you can work at getting back into the shape you would like to be!

[CrissyDi]

Thanks, Doula, lots of great tips. Hubby and I went on a date last night and even enjoyed a movie and shopping today... sans the little bundle. It was nice just focusing on him and he on me. Our lives will never be the same and we wouldn't have it any other way... yet it is nice to take the time to love on one another and be "a couple."

For now, still nursing, but I do plan on adding a home workout during Kai's nap or even when he has playtime on the floor next to me. Not a hugh change... but these little steps, I believe, will make a big difference. Thanks for the advice.