[kp2171]

Selective "appropriate" use if the N word is a double standard.

Yes, the meaning and context can change... and I think I understand, as best I can, the intent when used in the community as opposed to the interpretation when its used by someone not black.

But as I said in my own personal example, once you introduce that word into a casual vernacular, it's there... waiting to be used. Whites used it as a slur, and some still do. But for blacks to use it and say its is a different context and meaning... again, their right, but a dangerous, and irresponsible line to walk.

My daughter dated and was friends with some asian kids in school. A common term used among them and non-asians is "rice." when one of her friends customized a car in the manner many of the asian kids were doing, they said it was "riced up." even among the kids themselves, they had nicknames... she has latin blood in her so they called her "spanish rice" even though she was only dating one of the asian boys and was friends with others. "white rice" were white kids who were friends or dating, etc.

I cringed every time I heard this. I don't like writing it... obviously it is simply some kids playing with labels. And the more we can laugh at ourselves, the better. But if a politician used that term "riced"... they'd be in a storm of trouble. So, again, the use of the term might "band" the individuals using it affectionately, but it is a double standard when you consider its use in the broad, public sense.

Look at the furor over the NO mayor using the term "chocolate city" after the hurricane. Its just a sensitive issue, and confusing to accept labels like the N word in some circumstances and not in others. I don't know, should mark twain be censored? I don't think so. There's a historical perspective there. Its hard to find the right amount of gray...

If I want to describe myself as a hot-headed, big irish-serb, white guy, my choice. But I project a level of comfort with the use of whatever labels I attach to myself.

Yes... I think the whole kramer rant was nasty and disrespectful. I cannot imagine doing that. I think his intent was to insult. Hate speech? Well, hateful. Not sure it's a systematic attempt to degrade an entire group. He was pretty angry at some specific people.

As usual I'm rambling. I guess I'm struggling. I think use of the N word is sad and deleterious to the community and confusing to the general public. And I also have a hard time telling someone how they should speak of themselves.

[valinors_sorrow]

Its funny that this specific topic comes up since I was just talking about it with a friend. The n word means something very specific to me (as do all words, good and bad) but it was defined long ago for me in a most unusual way...

I once witnessed its use from an old Detroit city bus driver, a really cool black lady who could stop you with her eyes. One day, after tolerating the intolerable from some white kid stirring up racist crap on the bus using the n word even, she stopped that bus and threw that kid off. The whole bus went dead silent and we all could hear her say, and I quote... "Your bad behavior just proved to all the good people on this bus that you do NOT have to be black to be a nigger!" The whole bus spontaneously stood up and applauded loudly over the laughing -- black, white, young, old. LOL Its not the word that is so bad in itself to me but the meaning behind it. The meaning of the n word enlarged that day for me. So did my view of racial discrimination. I can only begin to imagine how sick of it she was! And then the riots occurred... the summer I turned 13. And on the backside of that, I saw more people learn to take people on their individual merits and wondered, in that uniquely adolescent way, why it had taken them so long to figure that out.

As a brief student of the martial art, aikido, I can tell you that sometimes the best way to fight someone is to step into their camp, seize their weapons and use them on your enemy and to that extent, I think I sometimes see black people using the n word. It's a way to "discriminate" against discrimination. Not exactly my way of fighting prejudice but it is a way with the obvious inherent risk of it backfiring just like KP mentions.