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    gabi_mendez's Avatar
    gabi_mendez Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Mar 4, 2010, 02:39 PM
    I lied to my boyfriend in the past and finally confessed,
    I lied to my boyfriend about my past sexual parters, told him I only had sex with 1 guy. This was at the beginning of the relationship, and when I mentioned it he flipped went crazy and told me he couldn't deal with the fact I already had sex with someone. Two days later he decided to forgive me but then made me tell him all my past. Of course I was completely terrified of rejection and I lied and said he was the only one. But the truth is there was one more person!! 6 months later he asked me again, and a part of me wanted to tell him but I just couldn't so I lied, but I think he noticed my reaction. I hate lying it makes me nervous and I know he knew there were more. SO yesterday out of no where he asked me again and I finally conffesed. I Lied to I have to deal with the consequences right?? I don't know what to do :( how I'm a supposed to deal with this, do I llook for him and beg him to take me back? Or do I let him go since I did wrong? He will never trust again, I know that for a fact.

    & do you think telling the truth was wrong?? I just couldn't take it anymore, I'm not a bad person I swear. But I don't know what I'm going to do with this guilt! I NEED HELP :(

    ( excuse my spelling!! )


    Sad liar
    AmericanGirl01's Avatar
    AmericanGirl01 Posts: 145, Reputation: 83
    Junior Member
     
    #2

    Mar 4, 2010, 02:54 PM

    I really don’t think you should waste your time on this one if he is holding your past against you. Everybody has a past and if he can’t accept that then he’s not thinking clearly. All these experiences have led you to become the person you are now and he shouldn’t be holding that against you. Yes, you lied. You felt like you couldn’t be honest with him. I would be scared too if he flipped out like he did. Don't beg him to take you back, find someone that you're not afraid to be honest with.

    Not to mention... He DEMANDED to know everything about your past? Who does this guy think he is? If my boyfriend EVER demanded I tell him everything about my past relations, his name would definitely be included as one of those past relations.
    Scleros's Avatar
    Scleros Posts: 2,165, Reputation: 262
    Hardware Expert
     
    #3

    Mar 4, 2010, 03:02 PM

    While lying complicates matters and was probably a poor course to choose, your boyfriend needs to get over himself unless both of you are 12 years old. If he can't cope with the fact that not all the women he meets are virgins, he's in for a long miserable life. Let him go and find someone who accepts you for you.
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
    Uber Member
     
    #4

    Mar 4, 2010, 08:14 PM

    You let him go because he can't accept that you,as most of us,have a past.

    He blew this way out of proportion,so good riddance to bad rubbish.

    Get over him and find someone decent.
    Larken85's Avatar
    Larken85 Posts: 696, Reputation: 146
    Senior Member
     
    #5

    Mar 5, 2010, 12:41 AM

    I don't care how many people you were with, just that you are only with me. That is my opinion. Guy needs to lighten up, sounds like a real christian terror case to me. You aren't damned nor are you cursed. So He should quit passing judgment on others, its not his job. You do not go after him, he will either come to his senses or not but don't waste your breath. Aside from this, if he reacts like this in learning that you have had sex more than once, then what'll he do when he learns that you have done other things? Or when you slip up? He is a super jealous person and he feels in-expieranced and is having issues with that. It isn't your fault you have more experience than he does and he is going to put up or shut up in my opinion
    Gemini54's Avatar
    Gemini54 Posts: 2,871, Reputation: 1116
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    #6

    Mar 5, 2010, 01:30 AM
    And I suppose he has a 'spotless' past??

    Why are you buying into his insecurities (and yours) by 'confessing' past lovers?

    OK you may have lied about your past relationships, but hey, don't you think his reaction is over the top - in this day and age?

    I'd suggest you chalk this one up to experience and next time find someone who likes you for who you are, not someone who is worried about your past.

    Sheesh. What is he? Some sort of Christian fundamentalist missionary?
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #7

    Mar 5, 2010, 09:59 AM

    Don't spill a tear over a guy who cannot accept who you are. By the way, did you ask about his past?

    Leave immature boys alone, and hold out for a real man that accepts all of you because he loves you.

    If you have to lie, then he ain't worth it. If he can't handle the truth, he ain't worth it.

    Its none of his business anyway should have been your response.
    gabi_mendez's Avatar
    gabi_mendez Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #8

    Mar 5, 2010, 08:57 PM

    Thank you guys so much, your opinion really helps!!

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