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    aoifee88's Avatar
    aoifee88 Posts: 26, Reputation: 2
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    #1

    Feb 9, 2010, 03:26 PM
    Friend pressured in to having abortion
    My friend recently found out she was pregnant. Both she and her boyfriend
    Took it badly. She had decided to have an abortion but only because her boyfriend tried to blackmail her in to it by saying if she kept it he would have nothing to do with her and she would ruin his life if she kept it. I advised her not to have an abortion that she would regret it, I know she would because she loves children. I told her she has loads of support and worse things have happened people. I told her to think it through properly about what she wanted. She then changed her mind and decided not to have an abortion. Now her boyfriend still wants her to get rid of it. He's al lovey dovey one day and the next he's saying they need to talk that he still hasn't changed his mind putting a lot of pressure on her instead of facing up to it. She is in a terrible mess. What advice should I give her?
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #2

    Feb 9, 2010, 03:30 PM

    Dump the creep! I can understand a guy not being happy about having a baby he didn't plan on. But any guy that would make threats like that is not worth continuing a relationship with. Tell her to get rid of this guy. As soon as the baby is born file for child support.
    aoifee88's Avatar
    aoifee88 Posts: 26, Reputation: 2
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    #3

    Feb 9, 2010, 03:33 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by ScottGem View Post
    Dump the creep! I can understand a guy not being happy about having a baby he didn't plan on. But any guy that would make threats like that is not worth continuing a relationship with. Tell her to get rid of this guy. As soon as the baby is born file for child support.
    Yes me along with all her friends have told her he's not worth it that she doesn't need this but she's afraid that she won't be able to do it on her own
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #4

    Feb 9, 2010, 03:39 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by aoifee88 View Post
    yes me along with all her friends have told her hes not worth it that she doesnt need this but shes afraid that she wont be able to do it on her own
    Did you read what I said? She needs to hit him for support!
    aoifee88's Avatar
    aoifee88 Posts: 26, Reputation: 2
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    #5

    Feb 9, 2010, 03:45 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by ScottGem View Post
    Did you read what I said? She needs to hit him for support!

    Yes I know that but its harder said than done when you love someone so much
    redhed35's Avatar
    redhed35 Posts: 4,221, Reputation: 1910
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    #6

    Feb 9, 2010, 03:49 PM

    Guys come and go,but this is a decision she will have to live with for the rest of her life.

    Even with contraception its still a posibillity you can get pregnant.

    I don't like to ask for information on your friends age,but is it possible for her to ask her parents for advice?

    I also agree with scottgem,dump him apply for child support.
    aoifee88's Avatar
    aoifee88 Posts: 26, Reputation: 2
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    #7

    Feb 9, 2010, 03:56 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by redhed35 View Post
    guys come and go,but this is a decison she will have to live with for the rest of her life.

    even with contraception its still a posibillity you can get pregnant.

    i dont like to ask for information on your friends age,but is it possible for her to ask her parents for advice?

    i also agree with scottgem,dump him apply for child support.
    She has a mam her dad left years ago. Her mams supporting her too. She's 20
    redhed35's Avatar
    redhed35 Posts: 4,221, Reputation: 1910
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    #8

    Feb 9, 2010, 04:04 PM

    I would suggest your friend gather all the information that she can on all her option and then make an informed decision based on all of the facts.

    Her boyfriend is not considering her,only his own selfishness and his wants.

    He has made his wants clear,now she should arm herself with enough knowledge perhaps even some councilling and inform him of her wants.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #9

    Feb 10, 2010, 05:42 PM

    Get all the information for her to make an inform decision based on her wants, then dump bozo, AND get child support.

    Only she knows what she wants, not him obviously. Nor does he care.
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