[tiggerella]

I spoke of meditating as a means of gaining guidance, but I find myself needing more guidance than an "inner voice" can give.

In my current job, I feel trapped, because several promises that were made verbally when I was hired have never come to fruition and my boss won't tell me why. In fact, my yearly review at the end of my first year of working for the boss is the last time I had a yearly review - and this June makes 6 years I've been working at the current position. I've tried to make a lateral move in the same basic job field to get more money, a shorter commute, and better benefits, but each time I have a promising interview that ends on a very positive note, I get a very cold "sorry, we hired someone else" letter or phone call. It seems that when they check my references, someone is telling them something more than the dates of my employment and whether I would be hired back - and I've thought I left my prior employers on good terms!

I've been thinking of going into an entirely different job field, but can't seem to decide which direction to go, as some of the job fields would mean a few college courses. Do I want to spend money on something that is the going trend now only to find out that the tide has changed by the time that I get my degree so that I can't find work?

I'd like any suggestions you all can come up with.

[rosemcs]

Yes, many people find themselves asking the same questions as they are unhappy with their jobs. Usually, you want to go with what your heart and gut tell you, but the problem is, that the ability to get a job nowadays is very slim. It may not be the best time to bail out of where you are at and risk losing a paycheck, even if you are not happy.

If you are so miserable and think this job will emotionally kill you, then ask yourself if you have enough money to get by for at least a year or more of unemployment and student status.

It really is up to your level of what you can take. Whereas, in years back, many said, "go for what you want", now people say, "Take what you can get."

Give it time.

[Wondergirl]

Right now you're listening to only one voice, and it happens to be your own. Certainly there is a community college or a university in your area. Please call to find out if there is a career counseling office and how much they would charge to test and talk with you. You would do well to find out more about yourself (the type of personality you have, your areas of interest); this information can be obtained when you take the Myers-Briggs, an IQ test, and perhaps an interest inventory test.

Once you've gotten more information about who you are, a counselor will then be able to help you set goals and figure out about your job future. If there is no college-level testing and counseling available, drop in at your local public library, walk over to the reference desk, and ask a reference librarian to help you find a testing and career counseling site.

[tiggerella]

Thanks for both of the answers so far! Excellent, thoughtful stuff, rosemcs and Wondergirl!

Unfortunately, rosemcs, the job IS emotionally killing me, and the health issues from the stress are starting to build up. Not a good thing to know when several family members have recently been diagnosed with heart issues...

And I had already done testing before beginning mediations, Wondergirl. My career and personality testing show me perfectly suited for several appealing jobs, but therein lies the problem...

One of the suggested positions is as a novelist, and although I've already published a book, the publisher doesn't help with marketing and doesn't know any literary agents to suggest to help me with the marketing end, so I'm only making about $20 per year in book sales. According to the counselor I spoke to, I either need to take a marketing class (but don't qualify for financial aid and can't afford to pay it out of pocket without a better job) or hire a literary agent.

Another job I'm matched for is business management - which is the very position that was hinted I might manage to move up into, but is being denied me by my boss. I'm currently training the 4th office manager in the 6 years I've been in the same office, but once again, I would have to take classes that I can't afford to get the business degree that seems to be the only way for me to move up in the company - and considering that the boss won't even reimburse me for toilet paper I pick up when she forgets to buy it, I don't think she's going to reimburse me for college courses. Similar difficulties hinder the other careers I seem gifted enough to do, as the career change thing seems to hinge entirely on getting a degree in something other than motherhood. (Both my kids are grown and out of the house and both are holding their own.)

No matter how many directions I've looked at this issue, it all comes down to this:

1) If I stay in my current job, the stress will continue to make my health deteriorate and I may end up literally killing myself to make the money I need to contribute to keep the family budget going.

2) The positions I can get in my area without furthering my education are all menial labor (which I can no longer do due to a back injury) or have already turned me down.

And

3) I can't get financial aid to take the courses I need to move up and out of the dead-end job because my husband and I combined make too much money to qualify for any assistance programs, but we don't make enough to pay it all ourselves and we're just enough in debt that loan companies won't touch us.

Once again, thanks for the suggestions, rosemcs and Wondergirl. If my additional info gives you an "Aha" moment, please post again!

[rosemcs]

Is it possible for you to do without some things to take a menial job (something that won't hurt your back) in order to qualify for Financial Aid and attend an online school for Business Management? (I can PM you the name of an affordable one).

It would be practically starting over, which is a drag, but maybe a step in the direction you need.

Also, have a conversation with a few business management recruiters to see what is popular with the employers. Try and make connections with people that have that job too, so you can find out how they got in.

[Wondergirl]

One of the suggested positions is as a novelist, and although I've already published a book

Very few writers make their first million writing a book (I've written four that were published by a legitimate press, but no million yet), and it sounds like your book was self-published. Why not make sure the book is in good shape and start sending letters to literary agents? I'll help you do any part of that.

Another job I'm matched for is business management

Would working in a public library interest you? You don't need a master's in library science for many of the jobs. Granted, it's not the most lucrative job in the world, but it's very satisfying, plus you'll learn a lot about customer service and the library world.

Check the community college near you. Often there's a certificate program for "library technician." That is an entrée into better pay and perhaps more job choices, depending on the size of the library. I have no library education, but have made libraries my career for over 30 years. I'm smart and capable and watched for opportunities. I've worked in reference, in circulation, and became the senior cataloger. I also was in charge of the homebound program and started/managed the volunteer program. If you have a back problem, you could get a job as a cataloger (a lot of sitting) and not have to stand at the front desk all day.

considering that the boss won't even reimburse me for toilet paper I pick up when she forgets to buy it

Why did you let her get away with not reimbursing you?