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dreamerjay · Dec 21, 2009, 04:36 PM

Okay I was talking to this guy and we only texted each other he lived in Canada and I'm in NY so it was a long distance thing and we went 5 months without seeing what each other looked like than he asked me to send him a pic and I did and everything was going great then next thing you know he ask me to send him a sexy pic and I wasn't really sure if I should and than he got all mad and we got into this huge fight over a pic and he wanted 2 end the relationship because of a picture like when been through a lot and he wanted to end it over a pic and it had to be at least 3 times we fought over this... whats up with that? :confused:

emopunk7 · Dec 21, 2009, 04:41 PM

Tiger Woods found another girl?

dreamerjay · Dec 21, 2009, 04:44 PM

Lol no

JBeaucaire · Dec 21, 2009, 06:20 PM

Why make a big deal out of it just because he wants to? It takes two people to "argue". Just say "no" and talk to him about other things.

You know, DJ, please keep in mind what "dating" is supposed to be about... and nowadays that includes the incessant 'text-frenzy' that seems to skip so many common courtesies you would normally expect and GET in real life.

Remember that the reason you're spending time getting to know someone is to make a judgment about how compatible you are. You're deciding if you can live with the good and the bad that is this person's personality enough to "forsake all other possible partners" in life.

That's pretty serious, isn't it? Make sure you're willing to judge.

It's NOT the goal of dating to make a list of the things you don't like and try to change them because you've spent X-days working on it... not at all. A common practice and a consistently bad idea.

How much better would it be for you to just make simple judgments about your compatibility? When it's a bad match, wish him well and move on without engaging in all the drama.

Dating is nothing but a chance to realize that when the "nice-nice" stuff finally subsides and the normal moody-temperamental-short-tempered-sometimes-still-nice-whatever guys shows up... then that's who he is. If he can blow up a simple thing like not getting his way about this pic, how much more crap can you expect to come down on you over dumb stuff?

If that's OK with you, call it a good match and start making wedding plans.

If it's not OK, wish him well and move on. No drama needed.

Fr_Chuck · Dec 21, 2009, 06:24 PM

It normally shows that the guy has little value of you as a person, and is into physical. Unless the relationship has grown to that point ( and normally that will be a real life relationship, not online)

But remember once in email or text, it is there forever and can be on someone else's Facebook, texted to friends of yours or more. So if it is not something you would let your mom or dad see, don't send it, esp if you are young

dreamerjay · Dec 21, 2009, 06:27 PM

Thanks JB I decided to move on I can't take the drama any more

JBeaucaire · Dec 21, 2009, 08:49 PM

Originally Posted by dreamerjay

thanx JB i decided to move on i can't take the drama any more

I am sure you will only benefit from that choice... go, go, go!

dreamerjay · Dec 21, 2009, 09:00 PM

Thanks so much.

I wish · Dec 21, 2009, 09:03 PM

Originally Posted by dreamerjay

thanx JB i decided to move on i can't take the drama any more

I think this is the best choice.

It doesn't sound he likes treats you with respect anyway for forcing you to do something that you're clearly uncomfortable with.

dreamerjay · Dec 21, 2009, 09:10 PM

Yeah he was always doing that and was really controlling its best if I just ended it

amicon · Dec 22, 2009, 04:01 AM

Good choice-try dating someone closer to home next time! :-)

Romefalls19 · Dec 22, 2009, 06:33 AM

Not to sound like a perv, and I understand you not wanting to. But the whole aspect of wanting a sexy pic, men are more visual than women. I've done it, well asked for one from women. But on the other side, he should have respected the fact that you did not want to send one. No matter what, you always take no for an answer about those things.

You made the right choice in leaving you.

talaniman · Dec 22, 2009, 05:05 PM

How can he prove you exist to his friends? (Just being sarcastic)

Devorameira · Dec 22, 2009, 05:16 PM

You've made the right decision. If he simply wanted to show you off to his friends, he could have done that with a regular picture. Don't ever send a "sexy" picture to anyone - you never know where it'll end up!

Alty · Dec 22, 2009, 05:20 PM

The fact that he got mad when you wouldn't send one, well, that says it all.

Good move in dumping his arse to the curb. Let him find another gutter to occupy. ;)