[rosanna-hope]

Of what damage I've caused myself just in a year. I've got many scars and I don't want them any more, I feel they make me look uglier and I hate it, people always ask me about them and I have to make up a lie to tell them. How can I make them fade or how do I cope with this. I find it really difficult.

[trulytrying]

Hi Rosanna-hope. Sometimes when my feelings get overwhelming I hurt myself... I've learned that when my feelings are stronger than my coping skills, I resort to self injury. It turns the emotional pain into physical pain--which I can tend to. I do it in places people can't see... so for me it's a secret. When my injuries have been discovered I have lied too. Here is a link to a web site that really helped/helps me...
http://self-injury.net/
Maybe you can find some relief there too. If nothing else--you'll find people that understand (because most people don't) and that in itself helps. My therapist gave me an idea to use an ice cube when I feel like hurting myself--to hold it on a sensitive part of my skin so that it hurts but it doesn't damage. Let the scars you have (and don't want anymore) be a reminder and a motivator to try and learn another way to deal with your feelings. I truly wish you well.

[I wish]

I understand that life can be tough sometimes, but before you hurt yourself, you need to stop and ask yourself how physical pain is going to help the situation.

Check out these self-help books (scroll down for a list of categories):
The Guide to Self-Help Books – Recommended Self-Help Books - Self-Help Book Reviews

Here's an article:
Building Self-Esteem: A Self-Help Guide

You can't turn back time. What's done is done. What's important is to learn from your past and make a better future for yourself.

Hurting yourself is taking a step backwards. What you want to do is take steps forward. I know that it's tough, but you can do it. There's a light at the end of the tunnel. But you need to walk forward, not backwards, to get there.

[Gemini54]

The scars will fade with time - Vitamin E oil - the really pure stuff out of the capsules - really helps with scarring. You could also wear clothes that cover them, until the scars fade.

The big thing is to try and deal with your shame and embarrassment when people ask you about it. I can understand that you lie to cover it up, but I suppose that lots of people will guess anyway.

Perhaps you can just be honest and say 'I used to cut myself because I was feeling bad, but I'm feeling better and I don't do it any more'.

Of course this might not be appropriate with some people and you can just say you had a bad accident.

We often have difficult phases in our lives when we do things that we regret. Try not to beat yourself up about it.

[JoeCanada76]

I think accepting that you went through that experience. It should not matter what other people think about your scars. If anybody does have any judgement towards you, who are they to judge you. They are nobody. So when you get past the emotional scars of these experiences. You will be able to be happy that your still here and think of yourself as a survivor and not hide the truth. I agree with the above. Tell the truth. You can not control how others react. Be true to yourself. Except that this is part of you and will make you stronger.

Vitamin e oil in the capsules is perfect. I would suggest you take vitamin e capsule once a day, and also use the capsule oil on the scars themselves.

Do not be ashamed, it is part of your life experience. Now to the future.. (;