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    donita9132's Avatar
    donita9132 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Dec 8, 2009, 01:03 PM
    Father lives out of state
    I am a single soon to be mother. I'm due in jan. the father and I were not together when I found out I was pregnant, however three months into my pregnancy he moved out of state. At first we got along great, but he now has a new girlfriend, refuses to come into my state when I have the baby in order to sign the birth certificate, is saying that he will take a dna test, and take me to court and get full custody because he has a job and I don't but I am about to start college in feb. he is always full of drama and I would rather him not even have joint custody. I live in Tennessee. What are the odds of when she is born, keeping my baby that I have been on my own with so far?
    stinawords's Avatar
    stinawords Posts: 2,071, Reputation: 150
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    #2

    Dec 8, 2009, 03:53 PM

    I wouldn't worry too much about him taking full custody of the baby. However, he will get visitation and support ordered. You are going to need to show more than being a student to raise the kid though. Does he have a lawyer? Do you? If he has one and you don't you will be much worse off than he will. As soon as the baby is born go to court and file for support (which won't be ordered until the DNA test that the court orders comes back showing him to be the father) and for custody.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #3

    Dec 8, 2009, 05:41 PM

    This is part of the threats of most dead beat dads who are too sorry to pay child support and want to try and scare you into not trying to get child support.

    In TN, unless he lives very close, he is not likely to get joint custody, since joint custody requires them to live close enough to share the child latter in school, so often they have to even live in the same school district.

    You will not love your custody merely for not working.

    And agreed, if you don't have an attorney get and use one. File for chlid support, and sole custody, if he even wants visits he can file for that
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