[Destiny79]

Hi. Im 30yrs old. 9march 79. Need yr help reading or advice please? Ive been with husband nearly 10yrs. He born 8june 75. Bt I've been through it all with him. Am so tired. He had a few yrs affair with his sister in law, in that time I went through a lot of abuse. Always gave him what he want etc. Then I learned the truth dec07. I then also met a guy born 10march 1980. Whom I still love dearly. Fell pregnant. But my husband would not leave me in peace. I had to break it off with ths guy and return to husband. I need to know, please, will I get a divorce and will my ex ever come back to me? He is the father of my last baby and everyone knows it. Please advise?

[Mistique]

Get out of that marriage! Your husband is an abuser! He cheats on you with his sister-in-law... which is your sister or his siblings spouses extended family? Whatever... it's all the same to me! You also said you went through some other type of abuse (which you didn't say) but regardless... abuse be it verbal/financial/physiological/physical is abuse! Then he forces you to stay in the marriage after HE had the 3 year affair! Wow, I am surprised he let you keep the baby! He sounds like a real big tool and you should leave him.

One step at a time... first get out of the horrible situation you are in before you start thinking about another relationship. I would call the baby's father and let him know he is a father but I strongly suggest to deal with this divorce first. You can only handle so much and please do what is right for you and your children.

Contact your family members, friends and anywhere you now have moral or possible physical support. Let them know what is going on and that you are leaving. Seek all avenues available for women, if you need Welfare Assistance (I don't know your situation), counseling and/or temporary housing. First try to move out - which I doubt your husband will... so you might have to elect to leave the maternal home. Consult a lawyer and start the paperwork - there should be legal aid that is more affordable if you can't find a Divorce Lawyer that will work with you (again I don't know your financial situation).

You deserve to be happy and this husband of yours is a self centered, self absorbed, abusive, two timing, three hearted jerk - to put it nicely.

[Gemini54]

We don't do psychic readings here, and sadly we can't tell you what your future might hold. But, one thing I do know is that you deserve better than this.

Difficult as it may seem, you're the master of your own destiny. Start by marching our your front door and refusing to spend another second with a man that is a cheater and an abuser. I don't want to sound harsh, but if you keep putting up with cheating and abuse, that's what you'll continue to get.

So stop putting up with it. Seek legal advice and file for divorce yourself - you know you want to. Speak to your friends and family and ask them to support you. If your husband harasses you, tell the police and take out a restraining order.

You're still young and have the opportunity to make a good life for yourself, and to find real happiness with someone else.

I don't know if you and your ex will reunite. But it certainly won't happen while you're with the awful man that is your husband.