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    BabyDoll0417's Avatar
    BabyDoll0417 Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Oct 31, 2009, 08:54 AM
    Too Wet?
    My boyfriend and I must I say have GREAT sex. But I feel as if I get so wet it isn't as pleasurable. I get wet a lot during sex, but eventually I dry out. I feel like I dry out very quickly due to how wet I get at first. If we go again a second time later I feel tighter and takes me longer to get wet. He is average size, considering I have had bigger, but it isn't as pleasurable due to how I can get wet without any foreplay. It makes me feel very insecure and wonder if something could be wrong with me? I don't know what he thinks about it. But we both get SO worn out due to how long it has to take sometimes. We can never have a quicky before work because with us there is NO such thing as a quicky. What should I do? Is there such thing as TOO wet? Any tips or advice?
    bronzebabe's Avatar
    bronzebabe Posts: 333, Reputation: 62
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    #2

    Oct 31, 2009, 09:11 AM

    Nope, no such thing as "too wet". You are wet because he arouses you. You are very attracted to him. That is a good thing. Not sure how long you all have been together, but as time passes, we usually get use to one another, and passion, and attraction wanes a little.
    Enjoy! No worries.
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #3

    Oct 31, 2009, 11:21 AM

    As soon as you feel you're too wet, douche.
    sandalwood7's Avatar
    sandalwood7 Posts: 129, Reputation: 25
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    #4

    Oct 31, 2009, 12:57 PM

    Being wet is compltely normal. You are lucky! Wet makes sex better! Try and enjoy it and realise that this is what happens when a woman gets turned on. It doent stay that way all your life so make sure you enjoy it now. Not everyone gets wet easily so you should be pleased. Why do you think peoplebuy and use lubricant. You can never have too much wetness. Don't be embarrassed or anxious or shy about this. Be happy, truned on and feel sexyabout this.

    You are probably getting dry because you are worrying about being wet. Anxiety is a big turn off.

    DO NOT DOUCHE. This can cause imbalances in the bacteriain your vagina, causing thrush and bacterial vaginosis. It also increases the likelihood of trauma/inflammation to the lining gof your vagina which means it is easier to get STI's.
    sandalwood7's Avatar
    sandalwood7 Posts: 129, Reputation: 25
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    #5

    Oct 31, 2009, 03:01 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by JudyKayTee View Post
    As soon as you feel you're too wet, douche.
    Douching is harmful. Look on any respectable, evidence-based medical web-site. Not something I would recommend for a patient.

    http://www.medscape.com/viewarticle/490338_sidebar2

    Vaginal Douche (Douching) Information on MedicineNet.com

    It can increase the risk of vaginal irritation, vaginal infections, STI's, pelvic inflammatory disease.

    Not a good idea. Irresponsible, ill-advised advice.

    Quote from medicinenet.com: "Most doctors and the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG) suggest that women steer clear of douching"
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #6

    Oct 31, 2009, 03:30 PM

    I didn't say she should take up douching as a hobby - I said if she is so wet that she cannot enjoy sex, then she should douche. I keep seeing the same key word in my research - "frequent."

    You are certainly entitled to your opinion, just as I am entitled to mine.

    I realize your response to me is based at least in part on your belief that I somehow closed one of your threads, as you expressed to me by PM. If you no longer have a copy of the PM, I'll be happy to forward one to you. You aren't going to agree with anything I say.

    As a health care professional you probably shouldn't be dating someone with a marijuana habit which is affecting his life and your relationship with your family - unless you want to lose your license. You refer to giving advice to patients so whatever you do, it involves a license. https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/adult-...ip-400525.html

    You are giving advice to people but are here asking for advice about condoms? https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/adult-...en-403447.html

    I'll venture a guess that you aren't a Physician.
    Cat1864's Avatar
    Cat1864 Posts: 8,007, Reputation: 3687
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    #7

    Oct 31, 2009, 03:54 PM
    Babydoll, are you trying to say that because of too much lubrication neither one of you are getting the sensations that you need to make intercourse pleasurable? In other words, you are too slippery?

    It is nothing to feel bad about or ashamed of. It is perfectly normal to be that turned on with someone you care about.

    Have you tried changing positions such as you being on top? Changing positions will change how the lubrication 'flows'. Moving in different ways can add friction, too. It is something you would have to experiment with to find what works for you.

    You might also look into Kegel Exercises to give you better control over and strength to the pelvic floor muscles.

    Kegel exercises: How to strengthen correctly with assisted devices.
    BabyDoll0417's Avatar
    BabyDoll0417 Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #8

    Oct 31, 2009, 05:31 PM
    Thanks to all that have so far replied. Well its hard to do different positions because he doesn't get as motivated as I do. Sex is a top thing I love. I like it daily! But he ALWAYS wants me on top. Which makes his size feel bigger due to going deeper. But it still feels too wet. If we ever switch I try to dry off but it doesn't always work. When I ask him if he thinks I am too wet he doesn't reply. I mean I KNOW he enjoys it. But it isn't as great for me. The only time it is good for me is when I am on top. Otherwise its bland and boring. I wish I could get him motivated to try new things because I love experimenting. Even though he wants sex ALL the time? He only wants it in one position? Kind of annoying but still works I suppose. I just wish I could control how wet I get :/
    jmjoseph's Avatar
    jmjoseph Posts: 2,727, Reputation: 1244
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    #9

    Oct 31, 2009, 06:36 PM
    Wet is good, to a point. Being extremely wet sometimes reduces the sensation, for me that is. You want to feel the warm tissue against your skin. If there is a "hydraulic barrier", it reduces resistance, thus reducing the pleasure. So there is such a thing as being too wet.

    That's my theory anyhow. I am not a doctor nor a healthcare worker of any kind. I am just a guy. A guy with a penis, and an opinion.
    Cat1864's Avatar
    Cat1864 Posts: 8,007, Reputation: 3687
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    #10

    Nov 1, 2009, 09:57 AM
    How old are you? You will find that at different times (with arousal and hormone fluctuations) you won't produce as much lubrication as you are now.

    It also sounds like he is a lazy lover wanting you to do all the work. The more effort he puts into it the more lubrication will be used up.

    The Kegel exercises will give you greater control over those muscles and to use use them more effectively.

    If you feel less wet after an orgasm, you might try oral or manual manipulation (including toys) to climax and tighten those muscles before intercourse.
    BabyDoll0417's Avatar
    BabyDoll0417 Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #11

    Nov 1, 2009, 02:54 PM
    I am 20 as is my boyfriend. I mean I use toys, I can't do it around him though. He thinks its weird. But I know other men would like it quite a bit! I'm going to have to make him work for what he wants or just deny him when he wants it and won't do anything. Maybe that will kick his butt into shape. Do those Kegel exercises actually work? Like has anyone done them and say that they really work?
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #12

    Nov 1, 2009, 03:04 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by BabyDoll0417 View Post
    I am 20 as is my boyfriend. I mean I use toys, I can't do it around him though. He thinks its weird. But i know other men would like it quite a bit! I'm going to have to make him work for what he wants or just deny him when he wants it and wont do anything. Maybe that will kick his butt into shape. Do those Kegel exercises actually work? Like has anyone done them and say that they really work?
    I've done Kegel's religiously since I was a teen. Because of these exercises I have tremendous muscle control.

    In other words, yes, they work.

    As for wetness, we're all different. Some guys love a girl that's more wet, others find it a turn off, so ask your partner what he thinks about it. If you can't talk to him then you won't last long.

    As you get older, have kids, go through other life changes, your body will change, as will your wetness level. Hormones play a big part in this. Be happy that you can naturally lubricate yourself, many women can't.

    The most important thing in your relationship is honest open communication. Don't play games, don't deny him things hoping that he'll figure out what the problem is. Talk to him.
    Synnen's Avatar
    Synnen Posts: 7,927, Reputation: 2443
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    #13

    Nov 2, 2009, 07:02 AM

    Do you self-stimulate in other positions? The reason you may only really enjoy being on top is because that stimulates your clitoris. Other positions---not so much.

    He needs to get over his toy hang ups, and you need to stop worrying about being aroused.

    If you REALLY think it's too much, then talk to your gynecologist.
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,490, Reputation: 2853
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    #14

    Nov 2, 2009, 07:09 AM
    Seriously... this guy better get comfortable the way you are because this is who you are. Or find a guy that will. There are plenty out there who will. Always remember that point if someone suggests making permanent and dramatic changes.

    You aren't a stick in the mud. He should be happy about that.

    And about being too wet? He needs to get over it. Better being too wet than too dry. I've known women like this. Its nothing to be worried or self conscience about. There are more pluses for that than there are negatives.
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #15

    Nov 2, 2009, 08:03 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by BabyDoll0417 View Post
    I am 20 as is my boyfriend. I mean I use toys, I can't do it around him though. He thinks its weird. But i know other men would like it quite a bit! I'm going to have to make him work for what he wants or just deny him when he wants it and wont do anything. Maybe that will kick his butt into shape. Do those Kegel exercises actually work? Like has anyone done them and say that they really work?

    Yes, Kegels work.

    Once you start playing games - "make him work for what he wants or just deny him when he wants it ..." I think you are dooming (to say nothing of cheapening) the relationship.

    He isn't some house pet you are trying to train; he's (in theory) your boyfriend.

    I wouldn't want somebody making ME work for what I want or denying ME in order to teach me a lesson. Not fair and (again, I think) terribly immature
    Aurora_Bell's Avatar
    Aurora_Bell Posts: 4,193, Reputation: 822
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    #16

    Nov 2, 2009, 12:37 PM

    Kegals definitely work! Hmm a guy who thinks it's weird that you want to play with toys, and never wants to change positions, seems strange to me... More strange then perhaps being "too wet" or toys or wanting to switch things up... are YOU sure you guys are sexually compatible? Do you think he is shy or just plain lazy? I have never had a complaint about being too wet. I think if it feels good for you and him then it's working. If you aren't happy about it then you can start worrying, but it did sound like it wasn't as enjoyable for you, is that because you are too busy worrying what he is thinking, or it really isn't enjoyable?
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #17

    Nov 2, 2009, 08:41 PM

    Everyone missed this and I'm on the floor - Sandalwood recommend GUN OIL as a sexual lubricant!
    https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/adult-...ml#post1997046

    That sure sounds like a recommendation that a professional would make.

    On the floor!
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #18

    Nov 2, 2009, 08:52 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by JudyKayTee View Post
    Everyone missed this and I'm on the floor - Sandalwood recommend GUN OIL as a sexual lubricant!
    https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/adult-...ml#post1997046

    That sure sounds like a recommendation that a professional would make.

    On the floor!
    LOL! I adore you Judy. :)

    Buy Gun Oil Silicone Lubricant 8 oz At CheapLubes.com
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #19

    Nov 3, 2009, 06:33 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Altenweg View Post

    Well, and the good news is you're always prepared - you can either go out and target shoot or stay home... and go target shooting. Either/or.
    ProjectX's Avatar
    ProjectX Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #20

    Nov 5, 2009, 05:35 PM

    Baby:

    Same thing happens to me! Men love the dampness... but at times, it can get to be excessive when dealing with chicks like us. I have had men reach down and actually wipe some of the natural lube off and then put it back in. Once that is done, you actually feel more!

    And you are correct, sometimes the excessive wetness leads to premature dry-out. Keep a bottle of lube handy for those times.

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