[fwr]

I'm 18 years old and Ive been with my girlfriend for almost 3 years we fight all the time Because I recently found out that she smokes weed and I'm against it. And I told her that if she ever did, just tell me the truth without me finding out I wouldn't get so upset because I know everyone makes mistakes.
But by the time that I asked her over 30 times and made her swear to me that she has never lied to me. Her friend finally told me and she kept saying that she didn't. Until she finally cracked and told me.


It's been about three months sense this has happened and I still think about it to this very day.
I just can't get over the fact that she says that she loves me but she still treats me like I'm nothing. I didn't even do anything to her I treat her so nice and special. She doesn't hug me or kiss me anymore she treats me like I'm just her friend.


I can't find help anywhere on how to get over her no matter what anyone has told me so far I still want to be with her. But I don't... It's hard to explain

Like why am I so attached to someone that treats me like this?
Why can't I just get over her?
Why can I just be happy with the fact that we shouldn't be together?:confused::confused:

[NightGoddess]

Opposites attracts.

You will know when the time is right to move on. The more confused you get, the worse you will feel. Only you can change that.

[Gemini54]

This is nothing to do with opposites attracting.

You're feeling awful because your GF lied to you, and because her actions don't match her words. She says she loves you, but she lies to you and treats you like you don't exist.

Three years is a long time to be together at your age - of course you're feeling confused and upset! You've been hurt and deceived.

Perhaps you would feel better if you accepted that the relationship is over. You would also feel a lot better if you saw her less and concentrated on your other friends. It sounds as if she's moved on and decided that she doesn't want you as a BF any more.

Try to let go. It will take time because you still care about her - and you may never stop caring about her - but if you focus on other things, keep busy, see your other friends, the hurt will lessen in time. It does take time.

[talaniman]

Neither of you is 15 any more and people grow and change.

Read my signature and then check out the stickies at the beginning of this forum.

I think your trying so hard to keep something that has run its course in your life, and need to change things around, and do something different. It happens that way sometimes.

[jaime90]

Apparently she has changed in the past 3 years and isn't the same person that you fell in love with. Mainly because for her, the spark has started to fade, maybe you haven't changed as much as her and you still feel that love.

You should get the attraction you have for her out of your thought process and look at your situation- feelings aside- think with your head, not with your heart. What would the future entail for you if you stay with this girl? What kind of example for marriage would she be for any future children? Is lying to your significant other and witholding affection acceptable? What would you do if this continues and she doesn't change? Is the drama of a partner who lies to you, worth the little affection that she gives you? Not only are these good questions to ask yourself now- they're also good questions to ask yourself BEFORE you get into a relationship with anyone.

If you decide to stay in a relationship with her, you should probably consider counseling both seperatly and together. (my fiancé and I do premaritial counseling which teaches us communication skills, conflict resolution tools, and how to encourage one another.)

The truth is: you deserve better than this.