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nina dey · Oct 11, 2009, 05:01 PM

MY exhusband was abusive and spent 9 out 10 years of our sons life in prision. He has been out only a year and we have been to court for custody alrdy. I was awarded custody and he evry other wknd visitation. It seems he and my son are not happy with this all of the sudden as my son called frm his dads this evening stating that my son wants to live with him. IT was if they expected me to say yes! When I sd no his father told me he was taking me to courrt because he needs to look out for my sons bst interst. We have been apart a vry long time and I have since remarried. My ex still speaks to me in a rude and contolling manner and it seems as though he only wants to hurt or control me in some way. My question is... is this normal behavior for a past abuser?

ChihuahuaMomma · Oct 11, 2009, 05:05 PM

Yes- he wants you to fall back into the trap. You obviously sound as if there's no way that would happen! So, you are on the right track. I don't see how courts would let your son live with him.

JudyKayTee · Oct 11, 2009, 06:52 PM

Originally Posted by nina dey

MY exhusband was abusive and spent 9 out 10 years of our sons life in prision. he has been out only a year and we have been to court for custody alrdy. I was awarded custody and he evry other wknd visitation. It seems he and my son are not happy with this all of the sudden as my son called frm his dads this evening stating that my son wants to live with him. IT was if they expected me to jst say yes! When i sd no his father told me he was taking me to courrt because he needs to look out for my sons bst interst. we have been apart a vry long time n i have since remarried. My ex still speaks to me in a rude and contolling manner and it seems as though he only wants to hurt or control me in some way. my question is... is this normal behavior for a past abuser?

Whether this is the conduct of an abuser is for the relationship boards.

You cannot control how your "ex" talks to you - you can ignore him or not accept his calls.

As far as the visitation issue - when he takes you to Court he will present his proof that his is the better arrangement for your son; you will present your proof. The Court will examine the situation in details, possibly order some type of evaluation for all of you, and make a decision.

Unless you are a danger to your child I don't see a change in cutody.

And, yes, people threaten other people all the time. Very few follow through and of those who do, very few actually get a Court Order which makes them happy.