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Mzz_Debbie · Oct 1, 2009, 05:42 PM

This guy I'm seeing confuses the hell out of me! I'm 18 and he's 21, he lives about an hour from me but comes 2 visit me at least once a week. The only thing is he isn't very talkactive while I'm talkactive!, its more that he doesn't like to talk about his feelings and I'm too shy to ask him because he has told me that I ask to many questions.. I like him a lot so I don't want to annoy him but I want to know more about him, also recently after we have had sex I want to cuddle or talk a bit and he falls asleep!. I deff hate that because you can go sleep at home, especially since we live so far from each other and this is our only time together... what should I do?!

Cat1864 · Oct 1, 2009, 08:31 PM

My first suggestion would be to not have sex until you can communicate with each other instead of you trying not to annoy him and him clamming up.

I am curious if you do anything other than have sex. Is there more to your relationship than him once a week driving an hour to have sex?

justcurious82 · Oct 1, 2009, 09:41 PM

DUMP HIM!! If I can give you any advice at all, it is don't settle! You are 18 years old, and have lots of fun and good times ahead of you... don't waste your time on a dip like that. You need to find someone that is worried about how you feel, instead of you worrying about him.

Don't settle for less than you deserve:)

BlackVY · Oct 1, 2009, 09:53 PM

Sorry, just got to throw this out there... but sometimes a guy is just tired after a lot of physical exertion... so he might need a rest or just falls asleep without meaning to in your presence...

Also, some guys just don't like to talk much or say a lot. That's just their personality.

But I could be wrong about this guy and in the end, its your choice. Just thought I'd bring up a different point of view for consideration.

Synnen · Oct 2, 2009, 05:02 AM

First, learn to type like an adult. Chat speak is not tolerated on these boards.

Second--learn to communicate with him. If you can't TALK about sex with someone, then you shouldn't be HAVING sex with them.

Mzz_Debbie · Oct 2, 2009, 09:25 AM

Originally Posted by BlackVY

Sorry, just got to throw this out there... but sometimes a guy is just tired after a lot of physical exertion... so he might need a rest or just falls asleep without meaning to in your presence...

Also, some guys just don't like to talk much or say alot. Thats just their personality.

But I could be wrong about this guy and in the end, its your choice. Just thought I'd bring up a different point of view for consideration.

He did tell me that he was a very quite person, so I did know this in the beginning, I'm going to talk to him next time and let him know how I feel.

Mzz_Debbie · Oct 2, 2009, 09:28 AM

Originally Posted by Synnen

First, learn to type like an adult. Chat speak is not tolerated on these boards.

Second--learn to communicate with him. If you can't TALK about sex with someone, then you shouldn't be HAVING sex with them.

Sorry for "chat speaking", so I'm guessing I can't say lol, or any short abbreviations?
And just becase I do type like that doesn't mean I'm not adult, adults do tend to type like that at times...

Mzz_Debbie · Oct 2, 2009, 09:31 AM

Originally Posted by Cat1864

My first suggestion would be to not have sex until you can communicate with each other instead of you trying not to annoy him and him clamming up.

I am curious if you do anything other than have sex. Is there more to your relationship than him once a week driving an hour to have sex?

No we do other things, such as watch movies, cook, just chill, but other then that not much..

Synnen · Oct 2, 2009, 09:58 AM

LOL is okay--a lot of people use that.

However, using '2' instead of 'to' or 'u' instead of 'you' is just laziness, and a lack of proper English.

Yes, plenty of adults use chat speak--I think they're all either idiots or lazy. I feel that if you are adult enough to be having sex, you should be adult enough to use proper English when typing. Luckily for me, the site rules back that opinion up--according to the site rules, chat speak is not tolerated.

I understand that you have a serious question here, and I hope you get some great answers to it. However, I'm asking that you please refrain from chat speak on the Adult Sexuality boards

smoothy · Oct 2, 2009, 11:48 AM

Sounds more like a weekly booty call rather than a weekly date. And that's coming from a guy.

Gemini54 · Oct 3, 2009, 12:22 AM

I suspect that you may not be very compatible - you like to talk he doesn't, you expect to cuddle and chat after sex he wants to sleep.

If you feel that you can't talk to him because you might annoy him and he thinks you ask too many questions then it's probably as Smoothy says - a weekly booty call.

Cat1864 · Oct 3, 2009, 08:43 AM

Originally Posted by Mzz_Debbie

No we do other things, such as watch movies, cook, just chill, but other then that not much..

In other words, all of your activities are centered around being in the house.

Add that to: You ask too many questions. You talk too much. You don't want to annoy him. He doesn't share thoughts or personal information. You think he is shy (I don't). He has you trained to provide for his needs and doesn't take care of yours.

Why doesn't he take you out? I would bet his answers would be money, exhaustion, and so forth. However, he has the money and energy to drive over to your place and do what he wants to do.

How did you get into a relationship with a 21 year old who lives an hour away?

Red Flags are flying. From what you have written he is using you as a toy with just enough other stuff to make you think it is a relationship.