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    ssgirl's Avatar
    ssgirl Posts: 13, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Sep 10, 2009, 01:20 PM
    Why does my ex read my emails to him?
    Why does my ex read and keep my emails to him?
    dreamingartist's Avatar
    dreamingartist Posts: 104, Reputation: 54
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    #2

    Sep 10, 2009, 01:24 PM

    Because what you had was special to him at one point, and he is dealing and coping with the loss of your relationship. He is also looking back to a time when you made him happy and taking enjoyment in that. Maybe he also wants you to hear what you wrote and then think about those times and possibly change your feelings back to the way they were when you wrote it.
    Clough's Avatar
    Clough Posts: 26,677, Reputation: 1649
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    #3

    Sep 11, 2009, 12:54 AM
    Hi, ssgirl!

    dreamingartist has given you an excellent response above! My questions for you are, how do you know that he reads and keeps your emails to him? Further, are any of these emails that you've sent to him since you and he broke up?

    Thanks!
    ssgirl's Avatar
    ssgirl Posts: 13, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Sep 11, 2009, 09:03 AM

    Our emails are still linked.. he can see mine I can see his... he is the one that said he wanted to date others...
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #5

    Sep 11, 2009, 09:12 AM

    Unlink your emails, and get beyond this confusion.
    Clough's Avatar
    Clough Posts: 26,677, Reputation: 1649
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    #6

    Sep 12, 2009, 02:26 PM
    Hi, ssgirl!

    I agree with talaniman here! Time for you two to really get separated, if that's what you truly intend to do.

    Thanks!
    Romefalls19's Avatar
    Romefalls19 Posts: 4,739, Reputation: 1130
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    #7

    Sep 12, 2009, 02:53 PM

    Stop with the linked e-mails, delete his old e-mails and move on
    ssgirl's Avatar
    ssgirl Posts: 13, Reputation: 1
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    #8

    Sep 13, 2009, 05:11 AM

    He said he fell out of love and wanted us to date other people and give us time to see how we really felt..
    redhed35's Avatar
    redhed35 Posts: 4,221, Reputation: 1910
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    #9

    Sep 13, 2009, 05:15 AM

    And has he said he wants to get back together?

    Is he dating and enjoying his life?

    Give him what he wants,he wanted his freedom to think so let him think,he is not missing you,when you are still in his life via email.
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
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    #10

    Sep 13, 2009, 05:18 AM

    How are you coping with the breakup?
    ssgirl's Avatar
    ssgirl Posts: 13, Reputation: 1
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    #11

    Sep 13, 2009, 05:22 AM

    At first not very good... he said go out and date... I did then he started calling me a slut and a few other choice things... acting like I had cheated on him... I guess he thought he could go out have fun and I would just wait for him to see I was who he wanted... The fact that men find me beautiful, smart and funny has helped.
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
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    #12

    Sep 13, 2009, 05:27 AM

    So you re ok-thats good.as for your ex I say you ve had a lucky escape!
    ssgirl's Avatar
    ssgirl Posts: 13, Reputation: 1
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    #13

    Sep 13, 2009, 05:29 AM

    I wish that is how I felt about it...
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
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    #14

    Sep 13, 2009, 05:36 AM
    How long ago did you split up?it always takes quite some time to get over the end of a relationship-have you read the stickies at the top of this page?there s a lot of good advice there.
    jmjoseph's Avatar
    jmjoseph Posts: 2,727, Reputation: 1244
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    #15

    Sep 13, 2009, 05:49 AM
    It sounds like you two aren't quite through.

    Why does he re-read, and why do you care?

    I think that's because you both are still in love with each other.
    ssgirl's Avatar
    ssgirl Posts: 13, Reputation: 1
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    #16

    Sep 13, 2009, 05:58 AM

    It does feel done... I am in love with him... he says he fell out of love with me... relationships become so more complicated than they need to be... in any case the waiting is killing me...
    jmjoseph's Avatar
    jmjoseph Posts: 2,727, Reputation: 1244
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    #17

    Sep 13, 2009, 06:05 AM
    Love gives us our highest highs and lowest lows.
    ssgirl's Avatar
    ssgirl Posts: 13, Reputation: 1
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    #18

    Sep 13, 2009, 06:08 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by amicon View Post
    how long ago did you split up?it always takes quite some time to get over the end of a relationship-have you read the stickies at the top of this page?there s a lot of good advice there.
    We split up 6 weeks ago... we had a long distance relationship... I had quit my job moved to North Carolina in June of 07, then things were not going well so I left to visit friends in May of 08... a girlfriend was on line looking at North Carolina men and said isn't this your man... and it was in the 2 weeks I had been gone he had advertised on many dating sites... and lied about it until I provided him proof he was lying... I then stayed away... got my old job back we would see each other about every 6 weeks... talk most days... we then felt we worked though our issues... he ask me to quit my job and move back... I quit my job... and started to move back... he said he did not want to lock this thing down... wanted us to date others... and he was not sorry about me having no job... so he says... so here I am... few weeks before the break up he said he loved me and thought we could have a great life together...
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
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    #19

    Sep 13, 2009, 06:17 AM
    I hope you re managing to find a job.could you move back again?
    You don't need this clown in your life-you should concentrate on becoming strong and whole again.eventually you will meet a decent man-they do exist-and find real happiness.
    ssgirl's Avatar
    ssgirl Posts: 13, Reputation: 1
    New Member
    		  
    #20

    Sep 13, 2009, 06:29 AM

    I am a smart woman... and I know their decent men out there... somewhere in the world... I thought he was one... it is a cause of the head and heart being in two different places... thank you this is really helping
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