[Green Elephant]

I started my first semester at a school of art and design, and I'm loving it. I'm also in a very serious band and we're trying our best to be successful in the music industry.

I'm writing because I have an overall sense of anxiety that comes every single day when I think about my future with school, and the band. It's hard enough balancing full time school, work, and a band.

Knowing that school will always be here, I'd like to say that if the band had a serious opportunity, I'd run with it, and see where it went. But that gives me anxiety thinking about taking time off school.

Does anyone have advice on how to handle stress of having your days completely filled with obligations? Anything would much appreciated.

[Clough]

Hi, Green Elephant!

You sound like a very ambitious person!

I've suffered with anxiety and panic attacks for most of my life. I also wear a number of different "hats" as far as the many things that I do in order to make a living for myself. I've had to say "No" many times to doing certain, additional things, because there just simply isn't time for everything that I'd like to do. I've also found, that if I'm not getting enough sleep nor enough nourishment for myself, that I'm more likely to feel anxious about things.

One of the things that I would love to be able to do, would be for me to be a full-time musician. Unfortunately, around where I live, the type of music that I like to play that most isn't supported very much. If I lived in a much larger metropolitan area, I would probably be able to be a musician full-time playing the type of music that I most like to play.

If the band that you're in got good enough, do you think that there would be enough of a market around where you are for all of you to make a living performing? Also, is the art and design things that are done via a computer and do you know that you'll be able to find a job for what you'll have learned?

Thanks!

[Green Elephant]

Thank you very much for the response.

The area I live in is very acceptable to the music I play, and I feel there is a good chance I could make a living from it. But that is where the anxiety lies. I'm afraid If I make that jump to being a full time musician, it will take all of my free time, and I'm afraid I wouldn't have time for that equal pull for graphic design.

A part of me says to just suck it up, and deal with the anxiety, another part of me says we weren't supposed to live in fear, and have that negative weight on us.

The strangest thing is when I look at my schedule, it looks like I'll be able to pursue both without wasting away under stress, but there is still an unnameable pressure.

Do you think I'm just meeting resistance with my goals?

Thank you very much for your thoughts.

[Wondergirl]

Thank you very much for the response. I'm afraid If i make that jump to being a full time musician, it will take all of my free time, and I'm afraid i wouldn't have time for that equal pull for graphic design.

A part of me says to just suck it up, and deal with the anxiety, another part of me says we weren't supposed to live in fear, and have that negative weight on us.

The strangest thing is when i look at my schedule, it looks like i'll be able to pursue both without wasting away under stress, but there is still an unnameable pressure.

Do you think I'm just meeting resistance with my goals?

I think you are being your own worst enemy. I've juggled teaching in some form or other, being a wife and mom, library work, and being a counselor for years and have loved every minute of my life! And I still have time to eat and sleep...

[Clough]

Hi again, Green Elephant!

Do you consider yourself to have any perfectionistic tendencies? I know that I have them. I want to do a lot of different things and do them all well! I also know that being that way can be a cause for me to have feelings of anxiety.

Thanks!

[Green Elephant]

Yes, I am my own enemy, and I am a perfectionist. I just want to do great things, and I believe there are other things in life that try to stop great things from happening.

Thank you both very much.

[Clough]

Hi again, Green Elephant!

You state that you're a perfectionist. But, are you a literal perfectionist? There is a difference...

A literal perfectionist has trouble moving on to other things and typically can't have a lot of different things going on. Whereas, someone who simply has perfectionist tendencies, is capable of doing a number of different things, granted, wants to do them well, but realizes when he's done the best that he can and moves on to other things.

Thanks!

[Wondergirl]

I too am a perfectionist -- finally was able to move from being a literal one to a fun one! Choose one thing and, as you grow into it, time will open up for choosing another thing to add. I had my kids, they grew up enough that I could add part-time library work, was already a teacher, so I tutored a few times a week too, then moved into a full-time library job that made me enough money to go to grad school for counseling. It look a little dancing around sometimes, but because I am a perfectionist and smart, I figured out how to balance everything.

Start small, with one thing. Then as you grow into it, time and opportunity will open up. Trust me!

[rockie100]

Ever seen the movie Peaceful Warrior? I think you would gain something from watching it. True story of overcoming odds and how to tap into new strength and understanding. Let me know what you think.

[Clough]

I do like your idea about being a "fun" perfectionist, Wondergirl!

Thanks!

[Clough]

Originally posted by Wondergirl:

I'll bet you are one too, Clough!

Yes, I am Wondergirl, yes, I am...

Thanks!

[Green Elephant]

Thank you all very much for your advice, it's helped my way of thinking very much these past couple days.

[Clough]

I'm glad that it's helping you, Green Elephant!

Hopefully, we'll all be on here at the same time, if you'd like to continue the discussion and work on finding some proactive solutions that will help to ease your anxiety.

Thanks!