[Lillybelle31]

My boyfriend of 2 years wants to have a threesome with me and another male, I'm not sure about it, is he using me ? If he really loves me, why is he willing to share me? He treats me well, but I'm having second thoughts about this relationship

Help!:confused:

[ChihuahuaMomma]

First off, please only post once, your question will get answered.

I've never heard of a relationship surviving after a threesome. Have you questioned his sexuality? Most men that want to have threesomes, want them with two women. I don't think its you he's wanting to share... have you talked to HIM about this, what has he said?

[Lillybelle31]

I had my suspicions about that, I have tried to ask him if he is bi curious , but he insists he is not.

[ChihuahuaMomma]

What is his explanation for wanting to invite a male into the bedroom with the two of you then?

[Lillybelle31]

He says that it would turn him on to watch another man give me pleasure... but I truly deep down think that he may be bi... I have suspected it for a while, but ignored it, till now...

[ChihuahuaMomma]

I don't buy that excuse now, and never will? He wants to watch another man have sex with his girlfriend? And he has no plans to enter into the situation? So he would have no issue with you cheating on him if he got to watch? Don't buy it, he's gay or at least bi.

[Lillybelle31]

Thanks for the response :)

[ChihuahuaMomma]

You're welcome. I'm sure there will be others to come along and respond with more advice.

[Alty]

First, just because a guy wants a threesome with another guy, doesn't mean he's bi. I had a threesome with two guys back in the day, there are ways to do this without the guys "crossing swords".

Having said that, I was not in a relationship with either guy, which is probably why we're still friends today.

If you don't want to do this, then don't. Tell him how you feel, that this makes you uncomfortable.

Communication is the key to any lasting relationship. If you tell him and he doesn't understand, then you'll know what kind of guy you're involved with.

[Gemini54]

Whether he's bi or straight is irrelevant.

What is most relevant is the way that you're feeling about what he has suggested. It's really simple, if you're doubtful or uncomfortable - don't do it.

Talk to him about it and explain how you feel. There are lots of other things that you can do if he wants some additional excitement that don't involve other people. If he makes a fuss or wants to pressure you - don't put up with it.

[Lashercelt]

If he is suggesting ANYONE join you, regardless of the sex of the person then I would really see red flags here. You answered your own question when you asked if he loves you why would he want to share you.. he wouldn't! The thought of you being intimate with someone else should sicken and hurt him so to suggest you doing it in front of him would tell me that he is not committed to you and to monogamy. Think about it.

[Synnen]

First off, let me say that I do not share most people's prejudices about open relationships and how someone couldn't POSSIBLY love you if they wanted to see you sexually satisfied by someone else.

Bullsh!t.

The REAL problem is that most couples do not ever achieve the level of trust and intimacy required to actually have their relationship SURVIVE adding other people to the mix.

Bottom line is this, though: If you are not comfortable with something sexually, you need to TALK to your partner.

If you can't talk to your partner about something this important, why the heck are you with him?

[Lillybelle31]

Thank you, everyone, I think I just needed to hear what I already knew from someone else.. I appreciate your responses :)

[HollySat]

It all depends on what you feel comfortable with, if you aren't then don't do it and either he understands or, it becomes a deal killer. Threesomes may sound chic and be the rage in porn but in real life they often wreck a relationship. Unless you're into it say no!