Check out some similar questions!

Mahlia513 · Oct 23, 2006, 11:15 AM

I am 18 years old and have been raised as an Arab-Christian. My father is Orthodox and my mother is Catholic. Both sides of my family are very old fashioned and strict. I am very conservative and have old fashion morals myself. All of my friends are Arabic, some of them being Christian and some of them being Muslim. Lately, I have been thinking about converting. I think I am valid in saying that I want to convert because I see the difference between Christian and Muslim families. Not to say that Arab-Christian families can't be strict, but I feel like my morals and values lean more towards the Muslim side. I don't mean this as far the religion goes, just the morals and values that go along with it however. If that makes any sense? I feel like religion is just something that you are born into and I feel like people should get to chose their religion. I do have some family that is Muslim and I have talked to them about this and they support it because they think I am doing it for the right reasons. My father however is a very strong Christian and I am afraid that he would be very angry with me and not talk to me. I'm scared of what my Christian side of the family and my Christian friends will think. Please give me as much advice as you have.

ScottGem · Oct 23, 2006, 12:37 PM

First, I think you need to do some more research. The morals and values of Islam are pretty much the same as Christianity. Both are based on the Ten Commandments and what's referred to as the Judeo-Christian ethic. Some Islamic extremists aside, moraly and ethicly, there is not much difference.

The major difference between the three major religions is the rules that govern their daily lives and how they worship. As far as I know, Islam is the strictest of the three. It requires greater control of what one can eat and drink. How and when one worships. How it deals with many other issues. For example, I was reading recently that Muslims cannot borrow money. Therefore they cannot be come home owners unless they save enough to pay cash. This also means they can't use credit cards etc.

So I suggest you need to learn more about what you would be letting yourself in for.

inaz4sun · Oct 23, 2006, 02:19 PM

If you feel that religion is just something you are born into, trust me, you are not a Christian. You may call yourself one, but you are not. So instead of kidding yourself further, maybe just call yourself a muslim. Religion isn't the issue, its personal relationship with God. Without that everything else is meaningless.

ScottGem · Oct 23, 2006, 04:10 PM

You're correct that religion is about your personal relation with God. But I don't know where you get the rest of that garbage.

inaz4sun · Oct 24, 2006, 07:28 AM

What part was garbage? Was it garbage or just a truth you don't want to acknowledge. The two are different things.

ScottGem · Oct 24, 2006, 08:00 AM

I was referring to your statement about what being a Christian means. I think he's correct that religion is something you are born into. Whether you decide that its for you or not should be a personal choice. But being a Christian involves believing in a set of values, and believing in the people who set those values. Those are things that are taught to us from our families who practice their religion. But it should be clear that were ARE born into our religions.

inaz4sun · Oct 24, 2006, 09:07 AM

Well you might be born into a religious family, that is a family who does some religious things, but that doesn't make you a Christian. And you can choose a religion to "practice" but "practising" a religion is meaningless as far as salvation is concerned. Only the one true God through His only Son Jesus can save you, and not because of your family or your practising of some religion or adhering to some rules, it is, as Scripture clearly says, "...by faith alone, and that not of yourself less anyone should boast."

Mahlia513 · Oct 24, 2006, 09:47 AM

Religion is completely something you are born into and I think that it should be a personal choice. And don't judge me and say that I am not a Christian or that I have no personal relationship with God. It's just that I am in a culture where I can clearly see both sides of both religions and basically whatever religion you are born into, is what you believe. But that's always been a weird thought to me because I don't feel like one of them is the "wrong" religion. I don't think that all Muslim people are going to hell because they aren't Christian or vise versa. Religion is a weird thing to me, but I feel like regardless of anything, it is a personal choice. And as far as I can see things, the difference between the families that I grew up with is that Islam is much more strict. I just feel like my conservative ways are more associated with Islam then Christianity.

Yes inaz4sun, you are a Christian and you believe there is no other way to happiness besides through Lord Jesus Christ, but how do you explain someone who is truly truly happy but is Muslim? I feel like if you grew up seeing things both ways like I did, you would be curious too.

ScottGem · Oct 24, 2006, 10:06 AM

Whether you feel more akin to Islam than Christianity or vice versa, is up to you. The problem I have with your initial post, that your reasons for feeling closer don't make a lot of sense.

NeedKarma · Oct 24, 2006, 10:06 AM

Originally Posted by Mahlia513

Religion is completely something you are born into and I think that it should be a personal choice.

Um, isn't that contradictory?

Originally Posted by Mahlia513

basically whatever religion you are born into, is what you believe

Not necessarily. I, for instance, do not have the same beliefs as my parents and it does not affect our great relationship in any way.

Originally Posted by Mahlia513

But thats always been a weird thought to me because I don't feel like one of them is the "wrong" religion.

That's very healthy actually - we need more people like that in this world. :)

valinors_sorrow · Oct 24, 2006, 10:12 AM

I was born into very vigorous atheism (a "religion" of its own even if its "science-based" LOL). Rejected that and looked into a great number of religions, came close to converting to Judaism, then completed the Rites to Christian Initiation, was baptised but left the Catholic Church to find my own spiritual path. Now when asked what I am (religion-wise) I am tempted to say "one of everything!" :p

I am with NK - more religious humility and tolerance is needed in the world!

Mahlia513 · Oct 24, 2006, 10:28 AM

I think you misunderstood me when I said "Religion is someothing that you're born into and I think it should be a personal choice." I was just trying to say that most of the time, or what I've seen growing up anyway, is that you believe whatever religion you are born into, but that it SHOULD be a personal choice. I just think that my Christian side of the family may feel a little betrayed and may even disown me.

How did you tell your parents that you believed differently then they did? My father is very strict and I don't think he will take it easily.

ScottGem, I feel I am more closer to Islam not because of their beliefs, on Mohammad being the profit or that people should pray to the East 5 times a day. I feel like that is what people are TOLD to do by their parents or family members that are of their religion. But what I FEEL I am more closer to in Islam is for example the conservativeness that women are supossed to portray and the fact that the women's lives are their husbands and their children. I have talked to my friends about this before and not ONE of my girlfriends doesn't want to be a mom and have a family. I feel that this is a woman's instinct and we are BORN with the desire to have chlidren and families and be mothers. Not that I don't want to have a small job and make some what of a living on my own when the children get older, but I do feel like it is the husbands responsibility to bring in the pay check. As I feel it is the women's responsibility to take care of the husband, the cleaning and the cooking. Maybe not ALL women feel this way, especially feminist woman or whatever, but in my culture that's how we are raised, to think this way. And Muslim families do this WAY more so then Christian families. From my experience anways. So this is how I see it, if women are so inclined and feel the need of this, then why fight it I guess? But again I am 18 and I'm afraid that I only see things like this because I am young.

NeedKarma · Oct 24, 2006, 10:49 AM

Sorry Mahlia, I did misunderstand the comment, sorry about that - thanks for setting me straight.

I assume our parents are quite different people. My father was not very strict in that sense. He allowed enough rope to explore the world. I went to mass once in a while but after I got my own place I was independent of my parents and free to do as I wish.

ScottGem · Oct 24, 2006, 10:51 AM

I still (even more) say you need to do more research. I believe that most woman, but not all, do have the instinct to bear and raise children. But I definitely do not see that a woman has to make that her total focus. Frankly I think that the way Islam regulates and forces a woman into a subservient role is one of the most wrong things about it.

As my daughter was growing up, my wife stayed home and took care of her and the home. But not solely. I had a very active role in both. As she got older and didn't need more care, my wife was able to go back to work to have something of her own life outside the home. Something I have no objection to, in fact, I encourage.

The point is Islam doesn't give you the choice. And I am all about personal choice. There is nothing in Christianity that says you can't love your husband and family and spend your time taking care of them. But at least that is your choice, not dictated to you.

31pumpkin · Oct 24, 2006, 10:52 AM

I think that one may be born into a certain Religion, but when they are a certain age they definitely reaffirm their faith (as in becoming born-again).

I think if one is perfectly happy being a Muslim, that is the reason why they remain so. It is when someone is not completely happy that they search for something else.

My parents did all the sacraments for us when we were children, but they weren't very strict about being Catholic. As I got into my teens, we slipped further away( from going to church,etc.) My parents died when I was 18, and I never knew(until much later that I had a Comforter there to help me-for the asking) But God is faithful. He knows who are His.

So, subjected to the opinions of man (the world) instead of the Glory of the Lord, I spent some 12 yrs. Working extra hard for treasure that bore little fruit.

When I became born-again at 30, pregnant, and yes, even underwent an exorcism ( don't ask) Well, everything changed, from the inside out, & vice-versa if you will!

Ever since I made Jesus Lord and Savior of my life- the Holy Spirit did the rest.(I don't mean I sat back ildly-if you know what I mean)

I'm sorry for the TESTIMONY, but it's basically there to give you an example of my personal relationship with the Lord. I feel I don't just pray to the Lord. I feel He keeps me company wherever I go. It's not so restrictive as some other Faiths. I found it to be really liberating.

Hope you can understand how I feel about my faith from this post.

RickJ · Oct 24, 2006, 10:54 AM

I agree that [most] Christians and Moslems stand side by side on moral issues. In fact, many other faith groups are also similar.

I also partially agree on the "born into" issue: That is, that because one practices like he's been taught since he was born does not make him a Christian or Moslem, etc. It IS about how you view God and what group you believe holds the fullest truths that God has revealed to Man by special revelation... which for me is all about history and facts.

Don't change the faith group you follow based on their moral positions. Keep reading and researching. With which one do you find the facts of the founder to be more believable?

... now, I've deleted and repasted and deleted and repasted several times... and will just go with it. Certainly I have not done the subject justice, as volumes and volumes have been written on it... but enough blabbering I suppose :o

valinors_sorrow · Oct 24, 2006, 10:59 AM

Originally Posted by Mahlia513

How did you tell your parents that you believed differently then they did? My father is very strict and I don't think he will take it easily.

To be more responsible about what I posted, I have to admit to having had a very permissive family compared to you Mahlia. And yet, I would like to add that while family influence and cultural pressures are not inherently bad, it is important for each person to explore and discover their way in life, including choosing what kind of life and faith to follow. I want you to know I see you doing a beautiful job of that here, especially for someone your age. :)

Mahlia513 · Oct 24, 2006, 11:18 AM

Originally Posted by RickJ

I also partially agree on the "born into" issue: That is, that because one practices like he's been taught since he was born does not make him a Christian or Moslem, etc. It IS about how you view God and what group you believe holds the fullest truths that God has revealed to Man by special revelation...which for me is all about history and facts.

Don't change the faith group you follow based on their moral positions. Keep reading and researching. With which one do you find the facts of the founder to be more believable?
:o

I feel like I can't base it on history and facts. Because I don't know who to believe! I feel like I have no other choice, but to base my religion on its morals and values rather then the history of it. I think that saying, "I chose to be this religion because the facts of the founder are more believable," is not a good way, for me anyway, to chose my religion. I have no idea who to believe or who is right. I don't think either is "the right" one based on history and facts or not. That's the part that confuses me. I guess I am just searching for something desperately to believe in, but I'm not one to rule out other options or religions and I don't see how other people can do that either.

I will definitely do more research on this, but I feel like there is no ending answer. I have read books about Muslims converting to Christians and Christians converting to Muslims. It's just different I guess and even though I will Definitely keep reading and researching about this, I guess it's just solely up to me and what I believe in my heart is the right thing to do FOR ME.

ScottGem · Oct 24, 2006, 11:27 AM

Originally Posted by Mahlia513

but to base my religion on its morals and values rather then the history of it. I think that saying, "I chose to be this religion because the facts of the founder are more believable," is not a good way,

The problem here is that most major religions have the SAME morals and mostly the same values. One of the major differences is in the way each treats women. Islam relagates women to second class status. They are considered more as property. They are considered only good for bearing children and taking care of the home. Sure, some Muslim men may hold their women in higher regard, but generally not in public.

valinors_sorrow · Oct 24, 2006, 11:36 AM

Originally Posted by Mahlia513

I feel like I can't base it on history and facts. Because I don't know who to believe! I feel like I have no other choice, but to base my religion on its morals and values rather then the history of it. I think that saying, "I chose to be this religion because the facts of the founder are more believable," is not a good way, for me anyways, to chose my religion. I have no idea who to believe or who is right. I don't think either is "the right" one based on history and facts or not. That's the part that confuses me. I guess I am just searching for something desperately to believe in, but I'm not one to rule out other options or religions and I don't see how other people can do that either.

I will definetly do more research on this, but I feel like there is no ending answer. I have read books about Muslims converting to Christians and Christians converting to Muslims. It's just different I guess and even though I will DEFINETLY keep reading and researching about this, I guess it's just soley up to me and what I believe in my heart is the right thing to do FOR ME.

If I may, since you are a reader, please consider reading a book I just finished called The Spiral Staircase by Karen Amrstrong. It may help in your journey to find your true faith. I am not attempting to sway you in any directions at all. There are no sides to this debate for me.