[jenniepepsi]

I started babysitting today for a friend. Its going to be a regular thing now.

My 5 year old daughter and my friends 3 almost 4 year old son are NOT getting along...


Neither one of them have any experience with other children outside of family members... so I'm sure its normal.


So all day today, I have been ignoring the fighthing... if it comes to accually PHYSICALLY fighting, hitting kicking biting ect, or bad words, and such i will step in.

However is it right of me to be just leaving them alone and staying out of it?


My theory on it is, they have to learn how to deal with conflict on their own don't they? My duaghter goes to school next month (in 34 days) and maybe this can help her learn that she can't always get her way, and that not all the kids are going to be nice to her, and all of that sort of thing.

[redhed35]

You could always play a game with them,showing that each has a turn,you being the mediator.

Also getting them both to colour a big picture so they have to work together and share the crayons,you again helping and showing them,positive praise every time they share,or nice to each other.

Even doing a jig saw together.team work!

[jenniepepsi]

Those are great ideas! Thanks hon. Ill have to look for some toddler friendly games. Right now all we have is are you smarter than 5th grader and monopoly :P

[artlady]

I believe they both need instruction and that is the only way to insure lasting peace.
Make the rules clear, if the rules are broken,there must be a consequence.
For kids that are not used to playing with others their age ,you should sit down and show them how to play nicely.

Show them how to politely ask for a toy and how to share.

When you see them getting along,be sure to give ample praise and be specific* I really am proud of you for sharing ,I am happy that you are talking to each other *.

You may also want to get them involved in an activity where they are partners and they can only achieve their goal by working together.

If they have a sense of accomplishment together that may strengthen their bond.

I think you have to play it by ear but your input is necessary as well.Its a judgment call.

I would not be overbearing but make certain they know the rules and the consequence's if they don't comply.

Sounds like you have your work cut out for you.Good luck :)

[redhed35]

You don't even have to buy anything,getting them to help makes buns or make up an assault course they have to go through,praise and encourage the other child watching to clap and shout for the kid doing the course.

Get them both to put makeup on you..

Make up a play for them,dress up and act it out. If you can get them to play together,the battle is nearly won!

[jenniepepsi]

Good points arty! Yes I can definitely tell you've done this before :P thanks.