Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    ilovemison's Avatar
    ilovemison Posts: 9, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Jul 6, 2009, 09:48 AM
    My b/f has a hard time getting me to climax
    OK I have been with him for almost 3 years now, we have a son together too. I lost my virginity with him as well. We never change it up in the bedroom its always him on top and never really letting me do anything, when I tell him what I like he forgets and does what he wants. I honestly have had maybe 4 orgasms since I have been with him. He knows that it is very hard for me to get one too. So most basically sex is just to pleasure him. Im not saying the sex is bad, its great I just really want to start getting more organisms from it. So what should me and my boyfriend do? Or what should he do to try and make it easier for me to climax?
    shazamataz's Avatar
    shazamataz Posts: 6,642, Reputation: 1244
    Uber Member
     
    #2

    Jul 6, 2009, 09:52 AM

    Very few women climax through sex alone.
    I myself can only orgasm through sex if I am on top and I can control the pressure and movement.

    Try suggesting to him some different positions, find ones that work for you and get him to (or do it yourself) stimulate your clitoris during intercoarse.
    Synnen's Avatar
    Synnen Posts: 7,927, Reputation: 2443
    Expert
     
    #3

    Jul 6, 2009, 11:35 AM

    How about smacking him upside the head every time he "forgets" what you like?

    Seriously--you need better communication to have a better sex life.
    jenniepepsi's Avatar
    jenniepepsi Posts: 4,042, Reputation: 533
    Ultra Member
     
    #4

    Jul 6, 2009, 11:46 AM

    I agree with synnen here. TALK to each other about it. And he definitely needs a wake up call. Something along the lines of 'you don't get S*** from me until you give me mine'
    kp2171's Avatar
    kp2171 Posts: 5,318, Reputation: 1612
    Uber Member
     
    #5

    Jul 6, 2009, 01:37 PM

    m'kay...

    First... I'm a guy... and if all I ever did was missionary to please a woman, most of the time id just please myself.

    Period.

    I could rant on and on about this but I'm not in the mood. You have a lover who is either ignorant or selfish or both.

    Ignorance can be "cured"

    Selfish... harder to deal with that...

    Both...

    ...

    Hit the road and get a vibe.

    I know... I know... you have a child together and it isn't that easy. I'm being a little pi$$y toward him because I can, its easy, its justified, and I'm irish.

    Have you tried to self stimulate with a wet finger while he is on you missionary? One lover could get off all the time with cl!toral stim by me or by her missionary.

    The next lover... missionary did NOTHING for her ever. e. v. e. r.

    So... time to take control of yourself.

    You get the respect you demand at best, and sometimes not even that.

    If he protests because you want to try woman on top or other positions that better pleasure you... well.. then you know you have a lover who is only interested in himself.

    It is NOT uncommon for a woman to have to work harder than a man to find what works for her... but that doesn't let him off the hook.

    Not one bit...
    Gemini54's Avatar
    Gemini54 Posts: 2,871, Reputation: 1116
    Ultra Member
     
    #6

    Jul 8, 2009, 01:36 AM
    I'm concerned that your pleasure is unimportant to him as he just humps away on top of you. Sounds selfish to me.

    Just say to him - 'I like this but I'm bored and it isn't working for me any more. I'd like to have an orgasm. What would you suggest we do to achieve this?' See what he says.

    Perhaps you can go to an Adult Store together and choose some sex toys for your pleasure, and some soft porn to get you going.

    Apart from smacking him over the head as suggested by Synnen, take the initiative and let him know what you want. If it's hard for him to hear, well that's too bad, he has to grow up sometime. It's not all about him - now is a good time for him to realize that!
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,490, Reputation: 2853
    Uber Member
     
    #7

    Jul 8, 2009, 04:53 AM
    Every woman is different... personally I like the woman on top position best... not only can she make adjustments that suit her best, my hands are free to roam... rather than just keep me from crushing her. (I am a lot larger and taller than my wife.)

    My wife gets hers any day she does not specifically say she doesn't need to get off that day. Its wrong to ignore the needs of your partner, SPECIFICALLY if you are married.
    ZoeMarie's Avatar
    ZoeMarie Posts: 2,049, Reputation: 468
    Ultra Member
     
    #8

    Jul 8, 2009, 05:04 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by ilovemison View Post
    Im not saying the sex is bad, its great I just really want to start getting more organisms from it.
    Assuming you mean orgasms, I agree with the others. I just caught that and thought it was funny.

    I've had two orgasms when I'm on bottom throughout the 8 years that I've been sexually active, but if I'm on top, I'll have one most every time, ESPECIALLY if there's foreplay prior to the sex. Talk to your partner. Tell him you're tired of getting the short end of the stick.
    kp2171's Avatar
    kp2171 Posts: 5,318, Reputation: 1612
    Uber Member
     
    #9

    Jul 8, 2009, 12:26 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Synnen View Post
    How about smacking him upside the head every time he "forgets" what you like?
    What if I like that sort of thing?

    Uh, no... I meant "what if HE liked that sort of thing... wouldnt it just reinforce the bad behavior?"

    Sorry. Couldn't help myself.

    Moving on... nothing to see here folks.

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions

 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search


Check out some similar questions!

Having a hard time deciding [ 43 Answers ]

So its been approximately 3 months since my girlfriend of 8 years broke up with me,its been almost a month and a half of nc.I feel a lot better then I used to at the beginning of the breakup .The problem I am having is that tomorrow is my birthday, I am not sure if she is going to call or not,...

Cat having a hard time walking. [ 11 Answers ]

Two days ago my cat started limping on his left rear side. I've kept an eye on him and simplified his getting around so I could figure out what happened to him, now he is no longer able to lift his tail and will not allow anyone to rub his hips. Could he have had a stroke?

Having a hard time in proving it [ 3 Answers ]

prove that if 'n' is an integer then prove that n^2 -n+2 is even I tried mathematical induction to prove it I used s of k = k^2-k+2 s of k+1=(K+1)^2-(k+1)+2=k^2+2k+1-k-1+2 =k^2k+k+2 =k(k+1)+2 I don't know how to proceed after this.


View more questions Search