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charliebatt · Jul 6, 2009, 04:10 AM

What are the visitation rights of a non custodial parent who is with the custodial parent and has been absent for 11 years or so and never followed the standard visitation allowed by court order... child is 14 and does not remember parent. Thanks

stevetcg · Jul 6, 2009, 04:43 AM

If the custodial parent never went and got the court ordered visitation modified, the NCP has the same visitation rights as s/he did before the absence.

stinawords · Jul 6, 2009, 07:55 AM

Until there is a new court order in place the NCP has the same visitation rights. If the cp wants that changed then he/she needs to go to court for a modification of the visitation order because of the lack of visits.

ScottGem · Jul 6, 2009, 08:49 AM

As noted the, unless the court order was changed it remains in effect. On the other hand, if the CP goes to court to change it, there is a good possibility that visitation will be curtailed and insitally supervised vistis required.

charliebatt · Jul 6, 2009, 09:44 AM

Originally Posted by ScottGem

As noted the, unless the court order was changed it remains in effect. On the other hand, if the CP goes to court to change it, there is a good possibility that visitation will be curtailed and insitally supervised vistis required.

The non custodial parent, mother, replies that now she has money to go to court and become the custodial parent. If she can convince my daughter which she is doing after her first visit. She has never paid child support and maybe this is her way out of paying. I just found this out last night after talking to her over the phone, talking to my daughter and after her initial visit this past Friday. After 11 years, I am uncomfortable about letting my daughter go to a situation I don't know about... I need to seek legal advice... things going too fast... thanks, charlie

stevetcg · Jul 6, 2009, 10:00 AM

Well, she is wrong about the change of custody part. Its not that simple. Your daughter's input is likely not going to be part of the equation.

You certainly should seek legal counsel on this.

Was she ordered to pay support and not paid it or was it never ordered?

ScottGem · Jul 6, 2009, 10:11 AM

What does the visitation order say? Was there support order?

stinawords · Jul 6, 2009, 10:16 AM

Did you ever get an order for support? If so, you can take her back to court again, and again, and again until she pays. Also, she is wrong about such a simple change in custody she would have to prove to a judge that it is in the child's best interest not just the child herself. You can hire a lawyer and try to beat her to court to have the visitation order modified showing that there were no visits for the last eleven years (that's a good long time) and the order should be modified. However, if she already has a court date to try to get custody changed you can still hire a lawyer to go with you to court but it isn't as easy as she makes it sound. So, look around find a lawyer that you like and get into court.

charliebatt · Jul 6, 2009, 09:48 PM

Originally Posted by stevetcg

Well, she is wrong about the change of custody part. Its not that simple. Your daughter's input is likely not going to be part of the equation.

You certainly should seek legal counsel on this.

Was she ordered to pay support and not paid it or was it never ordered?

Thanks, she was court ordered in the divorice document to pay $100 a month and insurance. She was given standard visitation. She has never paid child support, never visited, called or had any communication with her for about 11 years going on 12. She has a total of $22,000 to date owed. I thought it was in the best interest of my daughter to know her mother. Now she states she wants her 24/7 and after her first. She is trying very hard to convince my daughter. I scheduled a second visit and just hope my daughter stands strong... so far she is... I am very concerned about these intitial visits and have been inquiring about legal help... I don't want my daughter to change or be affected... note, I have made it a point to never say anything negative about her mother... my daughter's state of mind is what I am interested in... Thanks again... charlie

stevetcg · Jul 7, 2009, 06:50 AM

Get back into court and press them to get her to pay back support. That should pretty much take care of any extra money she has to fight you. ;)

What she wants is pretty irrelevant. A court will not order a change of custody after an 11 year absence providing you are still a fit father. I understand your concern with your ex trying to sway your daughter, but ultimately what your daughter wants is of little concern in court also. It is for the court to decide what is in the best interest of the child and stability is ALWAYS in a child's best interest.

ScottGem · Jul 7, 2009, 07:15 AM

Have you known where the ex is all this time? Why haven't you tried to enforce the child support?