[Vikingrage]

Well basically my boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a half. I love him so much. We met at a restaurant which we worked together at. We had known each other for almost a year before we started dating. When we first started dating we didn't have sex until after the first month because he said that he wanted to make sure he loved me first before we did that. Which at first I thought was very sweet and different because I had been used to guys who thought the opposite. As that month went on we kissed and had oral sex a lot which made me really wanting more. Finally we made a big step and professed our feelings to each other and we did it like rabbits. We had sex multiple times a day, pretty much everyday. I moved in with him a few months after that.. and the sex continued. Eventually the sex slowed down which at first I though was natural because we were both tired from working at a really hectic place but even on our days off he rarely wanted to do it... now we both quit that job and are currently unemployed and he still only wants to do it once every few weeks. I try so hard to initiate it but it seems like nothing works. It seems he'd rather prefer playing computer games more then anything. He masturbates all the time and also likes to cuddle with me in the nude and that gets me horny but he still doesn't want to have sex and I just don't understand how he wouldn't want to. I try talking about. I try not talking about it but whatever I do never helps he says that he's
Too tired
Just doesn't feel like it
Doesn't think sex is a big deal!
... but I DO! I love sex, it feels good. I have never had to try so hard to have sex with a boyfriend... they always want to do it first. To me sex it's a way of reconnecting after a long day... it's more then just "sex" its being together while the world dissipates around us but he doesn't understand that and I have tried explaining it to him. It usually ends up in a fight because I get so frustrated and that makes him feel like I'm just with him for the sex. Which of course isn't true. How can I help him to understand that? Should I just give up and stay sexually frustrated?

[megamanhood]

Sex between couples usually intensifies during the initial stage of the courtship (which I term it the "exploration stage") and can happen frequently. And it usually tapers to a more "regular" occurrence once the dust settles and eventually may become routine.

You mentioned that both of you are unemployed. Did it ever occur to you that your bf's mind is pre-occupied with something else e.g. financial woes or is he affected by being unemployed? He could be bothered by something else going on in his mind.

Perhaps you should find out what are his "real" problems first... get him to talk.