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jennaneedshope · Jun 22, 2009, 12:16 AM

I have been married for ten years my husband and I barely have any sexual relations I'm not really into having any and I keep telling him that I am going to leave him and he does nothing or say anything to hold me back he does mean the world to him and by him not doing anything to prevent this from happing it tells me that he does not want me any more:mad::mad: what should I do :confused:should I leave or stay?

Jake2008 · Jun 22, 2009, 01:47 AM

Between you and your husband not having sexual relations by your choice, and you threatening to leave, and then reading his mind, what have you tried to do to mend the problems in your marriage.

Have you actually talked to him? Sat down and tried to communicate? Suggested marriage counselling?

Gemini54 · Jun 22, 2009, 02:53 AM

I don't really believe that you know what your husband thinks - you threaten to leave and he says nothing. But, you've never left have you, so why should he say anything?

I think that you're playing silly games to get a reaction.

If you're unhappy with your relationship and your sex life then do something about it!

It may be that the relationship is irreparable, but you won't know unless you speak to each other honestly instead of making idle threats about what you may or may not do.

Take the initiative and do something constructive instead of making threats you don't keep.

I wish · Jun 22, 2009, 07:17 AM

Jake and Gem got it spot on.

He's obviously not willing to put much effort into repairing the marriage. But you threatening to leave him isn't going to help the situation either. You don't need to sink down to his level. If he's not willing to talk things out, suggest marriage counselling. If he doesn't show any signs of effort or progress, why are you sticking around?

If he's not going to change, then you're just torturing yourself and living an unhappy life. There's no reason for that. You deserve better.

talaniman · Jun 23, 2009, 10:04 AM

I am confused. If your not into sex, and he respects your wishes, what's the real problem?

jenniepepsi · Jun 23, 2009, 10:10 AM

Threatening to leave isn't going to do anythign but cause a bigger rift between you. This nearly caused my divorce last year.

TALK TO HIM. Don't threaten him, don't yell, don't complain, TALK. Explain your feelings, and ask for his feelings.

COMMUNICATION IS THE KEY TO ANY HAPPY MARRIAGE!

MsMewiththat · Jun 23, 2009, 10:17 AM

Question, not to be rude, but why would he put up a fight. Your not giving him love and you are threatening to leave. If it were me I wouldn't say anything either. Your lucky he is not the one threatening to leave you. Sorry I had to say it.
What is the problem here in your relationship that you are not sharing with us?
To answer your question about what should you do... you should figure out what the problem is in your life that you don't want to make love with your husband and figure out what is ailing your relationship and either repair it or allow him to move on.