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millymee · May 17, 2009, 10:25 AM

Hi All

I broke the no contact rule after 2 weeks on the wagon :-( Though the contact was actually a professional question I needed asking as he works in HR and I couldn't find my answer else where (yes, I know, no excuse!! ).

I feel terrible for it, as it's taken me back to a total of 2 days no contact now - but happy that I kept it short and to the point.

I am determined now that that is it! Our relationship ended amicably and he left the door open to be friends, but I have decided that there will be noooooo more contact made by me, and should he decide to contact me, I will deal with it amicably (not sure if I would reply back)

Is anyone else going through a similar experience? How are you finding it? How long have you been in no contact and any good tips?

I've read some really good old threads but a year old, so thought I would bring it into May 2009.

Thanks

chuff · May 17, 2009, 11:50 AM

You dated some in HR? Wouldn't HR of all people know this shouldn't be done?

I'm doing fine with my NC, but I haven't talked to the ex's for various lengths of time going back many years.

millymee · May 17, 2009, 12:02 PM

Originally Posted by chuff

You dated some in HR? Wouldn't HR of all people know this shouldn't be done?

I'm doing fine with my NC, but I haven't talked to the ex's for various lengths of time going back many years.

No no, he works in HR for another company, we don't work together.

snow124 · May 17, 2009, 12:14 PM

My ex and I split up less than amicably six and a half weeks ago. I contacted her the following day to deal with our joint bank account. She contacted me through IM three times since then: once, a few days after we split up to talk about something random (she hadn't yet realized I was not interested in contact), once to ask if it was appropriate to say hello if we ran into each other at school (we attend the same small university, where I also happen to work), and once, two weeks ago, to ask what to do with some of my things that had been mixed with hers which our mutual friend returned to her (I had thrown tons of her stuff that had accumulated in my house for two years into trash bags for our friend to return to her.) I practically freaked out each of these times as I do not want any contact with her whatsoever. Healing is worlds easier than it would be if we were still in touch, and I can feel myself having made a great deal of progress in getting over her, though I am still often feeling lost/confused/lonely.

none12345 · May 17, 2009, 12:17 PM

2 months of NC here. She left the door open as friends but I couldn't do that so I just disappeared from her life. Starting to find happiness without her and getting back into the comfort zone. Its so much easier now but there will always be times you will think of them.

kctiger · May 17, 2009, 05:57 PM

I stopped counting after awhile. I think it has been a month since I actually ran into my ex. Previously, it was about three months of NC before she texted me asking how I was doing.

At any rate, I am pretty far over it now, so I don't really keep count. At first though, it is really tough. Probably one of the hardest things I have ever done. You will be fine. It takes time and a lot of patience. NC is a form of detoxifying your body from all of the emotions that connect you to your ex. Emotions are hard, very hard, to get rid of. Just get back on the horse and keep riding. I broke it SEVERAL times at first.