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    Leviston's Avatar
    Leviston Posts: 16, Reputation: 2
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    #1

    Apr 20, 2009, 02:18 AM
    Suicidal Thoughts
    Hi,

    I am 28 years old, my girlfriend of 10 years broke up with me 6 months ago, I have been doing nc since then,I also lost my job in January and since I am on a work visa in America I have to go back to my country which I have not visited in 8 years,So basically I lost my love, my job and everything else, now I feel like crap, I have absolutely 0 self worth and I want to kill myself.I donot have anything to live for anymore
    liz28's Avatar
    liz28 Posts: 4,662, Reputation: 1034
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    #2

    Apr 20, 2009, 02:31 AM

    Killing yourself shouldn't be your only way out. Yes, you hit a rough patch but many people have. You can also get a new job and girlfriend.

    I know finding a job is going be a task in it own but it's doable. You going need time to heal the wounds for your broken heart but in time your be able to move and find love again. I understand your upset that you have to return to your country but is it possible to get another work visa or can you find another job to keep your current work visa?

    Killing yourself will solve nothing and you can call this national suicide number at 1-800-273-talk.
    Leviston's Avatar
    Leviston Posts: 16, Reputation: 2
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    #3

    Apr 20, 2009, 02:37 AM

    Its been building up for the last 8 months,I just want the pain to stop,the relationship ending was too much to handle and now this job and on top of that me going back home.I just want it to stop.Usually I am very rational person but it just hit me like a brick today.I feel lke a total failure.I know suicide is not the answer here but for some reason, but I know it will make the pain go away for good.
    liz28's Avatar
    liz28 Posts: 4,662, Reputation: 1034
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    #4

    Apr 20, 2009, 03:01 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Leviston View Post
    I know suicide is not the answer here but for some reason, but i know it will make the pain go away for good.
    Suicide will not make the pain go away. Actually a person who dies by committing suicide can no longer feel, so there is no relief from pain.

    Also, suicide releases you from life not pain. There are plenty of things to help you cope and get over pain but death isn't one of them. Once your dead your dead and you won't be able to change that.

    So you need to channel your pain in another way.
    alana1xxx's Avatar
    alana1xxx Posts: 64, Reputation: 8
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    #5

    Apr 20, 2009, 03:13 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Leviston View Post
    Its been building up for the last 8 months,i just want the pain to stop,the relationship ending was too much to handle and now this job and on top of that me going back home.I just want it to stop.Usually i am very rational person but it just hit me like a brick today.I feel lke a total failure.I know suicide is not the answer here but for some reason, but i know it will make the pain go away for good.
    Hi there,

    You say suicide will make your pain go away your wrong! Pain is a feeling and you don't have any feelings when your dead so how could you possibly feel relief? Because pain is something we all feel it is imimportant to know that it is something that we can help to subside this feeling will not last forever although you might feel this way now it will ease I promise you that and you leaving one impartant thing out, what about that girl you were going out with yea ye broke up but obviously you atill love her? How would she feel to find out you have taken your own life she would be devastated you need to realise that although you are going through this pain right now think of all the pain you would cause people that know and love you suicide ruins lives there is so many unanswered questions for the ones left behind oplease find someone that you can trust and confide in them the good thing is that you have taken the 1st step finding this site well done for that! Now onto the second step start thinking there is a way out because there is nothing is that bad there is always an answer keep using this site to help you I'm sure everybody on here will be more than willing to share their opinions with you
    Leviston's Avatar
    Leviston Posts: 16, Reputation: 2
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    #6

    Apr 20, 2009, 03:33 AM
    We have not talked in 8 months so I doubt she will find out, or that she even cares.I know suicide is no the right thing to do but for some reason its tempting.I thought things were going to get better but as they say trouble comes in three's.There is nobody I can talk to who will understand what I a going through.I will sleep on it, hopefully these suicidal thoughts are gone by then.If not I will call the help line, I tried calling them tonight but I hung up.
    MiSSsy111222's Avatar
    MiSSsy111222 Posts: 267, Reputation: 29
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    #7

    Apr 20, 2009, 03:36 AM

    Death is not a soulition to your troubles. Yes your heart hurts and your in pain but eventully it will get better. Look on this forum and you will see many people in similar situations and they do get through it.

    As alana mentioned you will hurt others when you hurt yourself.
    alana1xxx's Avatar
    alana1xxx Posts: 64, Reputation: 8
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    #8

    Apr 20, 2009, 04:03 AM

    Okay sdo at least you are trying to help yourself keep putting these feelings off give yourself time to think i.e.. I won't do anything right now ill wait until tomorrow to see how I feel and if you still feel the same then the next day do it again I won't do anything for now ill wait until after my dinner to see how I feel this will help to control your urge, as for that girl I'm sure she still has feelings for you even id they are not what the used to be before she was a huge part of your life and you were of hers for duch a long time she wouldn't be able to block that out is there any chance you could contact her for a chat so you can see that she is still human and doesn't hate you? You are being so hard on yourself you need to relax and take a deep breath okay so you have to go back home this is not a death sentence put it in your head you will only be there for a short while because you are going to work your off to get another job and pull your life together you do not have to stay there forever keep that thought in mind and as for the job situation this is happening all over the world a lot of people are in the same boat so don't take that as a personal blow this will all blow over you are going through a rough patch at the moment but there is always a way out
    liz28's Avatar
    liz28 Posts: 4,662, Reputation: 1034
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    #9

    Apr 20, 2009, 04:14 AM
    You keep saying your ex this and your ex that, who cares about his ex feeling or her in general. Thinking about her won't help his situation. In fact it is doing the exact opposite.

    To the OP don't feel embrass to call the hotline. That's what they are there for and sometimes talking your problem out can help inside of keeping your frustrations bottle in.
    Leviston's Avatar
    Leviston Posts: 16, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #10

    Apr 20, 2009, 04:35 AM

    Thank you all for your help, it seems like for now I have come to my senses, I just had a big falling out with my sister right before I had though of killing myself, it all hit me like a brick.Hopefully thi sis not a recurring problem,I am still depressed and I think I might need some professional help. As for my ex, we have not talked in 8 months, calling her up would probably not be a good idea, she might have a boyfriend by now and if I find that out at this time I wold definitely go jump of a bridge.

    Thankyo people for all your help.I will keep you updated
    liz28's Avatar
    liz28 Posts: 4,662, Reputation: 1034
    Ultra Member
     
    #11

    Apr 20, 2009, 04:36 AM
    The best option is counseling, family and friends, the hotline number, and this site. But please don't contact your ex.

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